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We finally got an appointment for 8 y/o ds to see a pediatric neurologist who specializes in behavioral issues. We now have a diagnosis to explain all the crazy behaviors of the last 2 years: Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. (Barksum suggested this about a year ago - she wins the prize! :cheer: )
Neurologist noted slightly low set ears, eyes somewhat close together, epicanthal (sp?) folds, thin upper lip. These features, coupled with the crazy behaviors (lack of boundaries, impulsiveness, failure to learn from correction, excessive talking, I could go on and on) that have been driving us crazy helped the doctor make a diagnosis.
He ordered a genetic workup, sleep-deprived EEG, EKG, Echocardiogram, and MRI of the brain. Also got a referral for a speech eval for his garbled speech, and one for occuptional therapy for his clumsiness and lack of fine motor skills, and one for a new psych eval. Whew!
AND...a prescription for Intuniv. We are typically very anti-medication parents. We have been of the opinion that C should learn to control his behavior. But the doctor said C's frontal lobes are just not functioning properly and that explains why no amount or type of discipline or correction seems to work with this child. He truly can't control his impulsiveness at this point in time. (Most recent stunt: dumping half a container of fish food into the aquarium. :eek:) So, we'll try the med and see how that goes. I have to admit, I'm ready to try something different. As the saying goes, "If you keep doing what you've always done, you'll keep getting what you've always had."
The diagnosis is a relief of a sort. Not happy about it but, in beginning to research FAS, I can see that it is accurate. In addition, the more I learn about FAS, the more I see that the diagnosis also fits our middle adopted son, who is now 13. Middle son has all the typical learning delays, poor retrieval and retention of information, small head, thin upper lip, no concept of money or time, etc., but NO behavioral problems. Younger son has behavioral issues but NO learning problems. If I could shake the two of them up in a bag...
So that's our update. Moving forward with a brand new direction and hopefully some light at the end of our tunnel! :happydance:
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I just wanted to say that I understand :) and for us, meds not only changed our son's life -- they changed OUR lives. It really does help to understand that it's not that they WONT obey (or we are horrible parents that can't find out what works for our kids) but that they CANT control those impulses. :) It is wonderful that you are so accepting of the diagnosis and willing to work with what the professionals can offer.
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my children haven't been diagnosed with FAS, but my son has all of those interesting behaviors. right now we're going on ADHD and RAD. either way, Intuniv is wonderful for us!
he takes it at bedtime. it allows him to sleep--really sleep--settle down, stop chattering. love it.
bonus--it controls his tics and makes for a nice transition from day to night.
i really hope you have great results.
Daisy,
As one parent who was SO sure their daughter was FAS because soooo many of the facial features were there.....I'm very glad to hear you're having a chromosomal test conducted. Should that genetic testing show 'normal', consider asking to have a micro-array chromsome test done too.
While our baby's chromosome panel showed 'normal' TWO times, it wasn't until the micro-array testing was done that small (but important) genetic abnormalities existed.
I know the dx isn't what you may have wanted....in time, *I* think it's good to have a point of reference, so to speak.
Best of luck to you!!!!
Sincerely,
Linny
[QUOTE=Jensboys] It really does help to understand that it's not that they WONT obey (or we are horrible parents that can't find out what works for our kids) but that they CANT control those impulses. :) QUOTE]
Jen, this is so true. When we first heard this from the neurologist it was like a revelation. Like "Oh! I GET it!" What was throwing us off is that C is so smart. We didn't understand how a kid who is so smart academically could be so hard-headed. We thought he was just being a brat--willfully and deliberately disobeying every rule in the house. Sometimes minutes after being punished for something, he'd do exactly the same thing again. :grr: The doctor explained that THAT part of his brain is the part that is damaged. That he's not just being willful or an obnoxious brat on purpose, he's actually brain damaged and truly cannot control his impulses. Somehow, in some left-handed kind of way, it makes dealing with him easier.
Now that I know it's FAS I can research it and learn the best way to work with him, keeping in mind that only PART of his brain is damaged. It's a dangerous combination. It's like he's smart enough to build a fire but not smart enough to keep from getting burned.
I will also say that after about 1 week on the Intuniv so far, we are already seeing subtle changes in C's behavior. He's not so tense, oppositional, or talkative. Nice. :rolleyes: Our family atmosphere is also decompressing a bit, and not a moment too soon. His behaviors were like a wrecking ball in our home. We're tentatively starting to breathe a little. :cool:
We're taking a "let's wait and see" attitude. Time will tell.
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Daisy - not the diagnoses any of us want for our children but glad you have something to work with from this point forward. I always feel better knowing.The Queen has some of the symptoms you list. No one has ever done a brain scan on her. She has not been diagnosed with FAS but I have been told she may have ADHD (too early to tell). My Mommy gut tells me we haven't uncovered all of her issues yet. I pray some day I will be able to put a name to it.So glad the Intuiv is working so far. Please keep us posted on your DS.((((HUGS))))!