My first post

January 1, 2012

Hi all I am new to this sight I am happy I am able to talk to people who might know what I am feeling I was able to contact my birth parents but I am not sure where to go with it I am feeling all kinds of crazy feelings my family that I know for 32 years is the best I am so thankful for them but there was always wonder about who gave me away ,who do I look like , do I have sisters & brothers it wasn't until I had my daughter and filling out a million papers with all asking about family history that I really wanted to know the story of me and what was really my family history was there cancer did I have to worry for my daughter well thanks to Facebook I was able to find a half brother who is the sweetest thing in the world he really changed my mind on how I look at people now I really wasn't looking to be apart of his family just wanted to know medical he was so excited to hear from me he told the world .... I was so wprried to let him in my life I always think people are going to leave me but my husband said give him a chance well I did . never been so happy if was as if he lifted something off me talking to him the past few months was so nice now comes the day to meet for dinner and he calls and cancels on me I am so hurt and heartbroken I don't get it ... I dont know what my next move should be ?

JustPeachy

January 2, 2012

What reason did he give for cancelling? Did he try to reschedule at all? If he had a legitimate reason for cancelling, I'd give him the benefit of the doubt for now. Maybe something really pressing came up and he had to attend to it. But if not, I wonder if he got cold feet. I wonder if he let your birth mother know he was in touch with you and it stirred up feelings in her and then your brother got caught up in the middle of that. It's really hard to say if he gave you no explanation. I can totally understand your hurt, but I think at this point I would try to find out what happened and see if he wants to continue to stay in touch. If not, it could be he had a lot of intense feelings come up that he is having a hard time working through. That can happen so easily in reunion for any member of the reuniting family. It doesn't mean the door is always going to be closed, but maybe your brother just got scared for now and will come around once he can work through his feelings. I think I'd try to find out what happened though, and see if you can get some answers from him.

Sorry you are going through this. Reunion is not easy. Sometimes there are these bumps in the road that get ironed out over time, though, so I don't know that I would give up hope just yet. I always say hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. And hard as it is, try to let go of any expectations.