Advertisements
We went to DHR wanting to adopt 1 child, a girl. We were asked to take a sibling group of 5; three girls and two boys. Their ages ranged from 10 months old to 8 years old and we had / have our biological 9 year old at home. We agreed and within a months time we began visitation with three of the children (ages 8, 6, 10 months). These were beautiful kids with gorgeous smiles. We fell in love with them. Months later we met the 4 year old and the 3 year old; they too were gorgeous. All these kids were abused by former foster parents or their biological parent. They had huge emotional scares and physical scares. After they all moved in, there was never a dull moment and our house was full of laughter, and sometimes tears. From night terrors to screaming fits for no reason. But we as a family all worked well together and we work on their challenges together and we all became stronger. One of our kids began to display violent tendencies and we BEGGED DHR for assistance. After receiving what they considered assistance we were informed DHR knew of the childҒs issues and were told that the child needed his/her own placement in a therapeutic home. We informed DHR we wanted to keep our child but asked for training on how to handle his/her violent actions and we also informed them we found out they already knew about the issues and asked why they did not inform us. Days later all 5 (our foster children) were removed from our home; weeks away from beginning adopted. They were with us for 250 days and we would do it all over again. We are all heartbroken and we have been told they will never come back. We have also been told the children dont want to come back and our children have been told we donҒt want them back.
We went to DHR to adopt one child and 1 year later we have none.
We want our children back; but we need new laws in our foster care / adoption system.
In our case DHR violated half of the foster parents bill of rights and admitted it. All we got is a sorry, we are so sorry......
Like
Share
Advertisements
Advertisements
I almost know what you've been through. Our DFS has had some significant behaviors for over a year and we have repeatedly asked for help. When I finally got to the point that I *needed* respite, even if just for a weekend, they found a new placement for him - just like that! They said they'd come pick him up and assured me that we could still be a presence in his life if we wanted to. That wasn't what I wanted AT ALL! I called his lawyer, his therapist, our FP ombudsman, you name it, I was on the phone with them - the whole time blubbering and ranting and raving like and idiot.
In the end, I declined the respite and our DFS is still with us. I asked for help - not for him to leave forever! DSS assures me that it was a miscommunication - that's BS. You don't miscommunicate something like that.
In our case, we avoided the removal, but haven't gotten the help, either. I cannot imagine how I would be feeling right now if things had gone differently. I am so sorry.
Have you sent letters to the supervisors at the local office, the regional coordinator/representative (may take a bit of research to find), and state coordinator/ representative? We were threatened to have our (now adopted) children removed over our refusal to let CW's roll a HUGE mistake under the run. Thanks to the regional coordinator getting involved we didn't.
Advertisements
You have been given some good advice...How long ago were they removed? A lot of states have a minimum amount of time children must reside with someone prior to adoption. I would check on this in your state...are you sure you are being told the truth about the adoption? In addition, as biblemom said I would contact several people...(even if adoption completed) to ensure this does not happen again.As to suing...not sure if you can, here you sign legal risk placement stuff that talks about no fault junk.I'm sorry your family is going through this.
Advertisements