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My Fiances grandmother adopted her son when he was about 3 years old. My fiance did not agree to the adoption and he was forcefully adopted by her. Dont ask how, it was a whole court battle type thing. The thing is, the father may not be who she thought it was. My fiance wants to get a paternity test to see who the real father is. So what I want to know is, If the father turns out to be the man that was not on the birth certificate, can he file for custody/visitation/anything?
any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
CRAZY_WOMAN
So your fiance is claiming she she lied on the birth certificate.
Why should this be the grandma's problem know?If the grandfathers a good lawyer,he would have made sure to get all the proper work got in,so they wouldn't have to worry about any fathers,coming out later. The courts would have gave the mother papers to sign.U can't just sneak adoption paper,without the mother getting notices about them.I'm just not buying this.
you dont sneak them. The grandma started the papers and then my fiance moved out. Since she was now essentially homeless and, it was very easy for the courts to say "custody granted to the grandmother". you dont need the mothers permission if you can prove that she is not a good place for the child. and unfortunately since she was kicked out of her parents and not living with grandma, she did not have a home.
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Also, she did not lie on the birth certificate, there is just a chance that the father is not who she thought it was.
CaddoRose
The best option you would have is to contact an attorney who specializes in adoption, family law, etc. It's the only way to really find out if there is anything she could do. As for a possible biological father that has never been in the picture, the laws in most states are written so that he would have no legal standing whatsoever. It's worth the price of a consultation to find out her legal standing and she should have a copy of the termination papers she signed along with any open adoption agreement. It sounds like there is more to the legal situation than you or your fiance know and only an attorney would be able to find that out for you.
Yea, we are in the process already of finding an attorney that will sit down with us. And yes she has boxes of paperwork on the whole situation.
Thank you.
smith2525
you dont sneak them. The grandma started the papers and then my fiance moved out. Since she was now essentially homeless and, it was very easy for the courts to say "custody granted to the grandmother". you dont need the mothers permission if you can prove that she is not a good place for the child. and unfortunately since she was kicked out of her parents and not living with grandma, she did not have a home.
Actully the courts sends TPR papers and notices before TPR.She could have asked the county for help,when she was kicked out.It's not the grandparents responosibility to provide a roof over the moms head.So I'm guessing the the courts terminated her right,because she abandoned her baby.If I was asked to leave I would have taken my baby,so I'm not getting why she left her baby.
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smith2525
Also, she did not lie on the birth certificate, there is just a chance that the father is not who she thought it was.
He's 5 years old,What's the point,if she's not even sure?
crazy_woman, I dont understand why your picking this apart? this thread is done now. thank you for what help you could give me.
CRAZY_WOMAN
He's 5 years old,What's the point,if she's not even sure?
The point was that if the father is somebody who's rights were not terminated, then maybe he could do something about her son. But that is what we are trying to get answered.
I'm not really buying this whole "forced" adoption thing. I think your fiance might be feeding you a line of bull to make herself look better. More likely, she either willfully signed the paperwork or had her rights terminated due to abandonment or some other just cause. It's just not that easy to terminate a mother's rights without good reason.
As for the father, you said the grandpa was a high powered attorney. In that case, it would seem extremely unlikely that they did not follow the law to the letter in terminating not only the named father's rights, but any other potential or unknown fathers that might exist. I would think the chances slim that anything could be done at this point.
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Longing2bMom
I'm not really buying this whole "forced" adoption thing. I think your fiance might be feeding you a line of bull to make herself look better. More likely, she either willfully signed the paperwork or had her rights terminated due to abandonment or some other just cause. It's just not that easy to terminate a mother's rights without good reason.
As for the father, you said the grandpa was a high powered attorney. In that case, it would seem extremely unlikely that they did not follow the law to the letter in terminating not only the named father's rights, but any other potential or unknown fathers that might exist. I would think the chances slim that anything could be done at this point.
Yea, I'm sure that is the case with the father thing. As for my fiance "feeding me a line of bull". I'm telling the truth. I have heard the same story from her, her mother, and another grandma. All were a part of the court hearing. My Fiance did not have a good relationship with her mother in her teen years and when it came time for the court case, her mother did not help. She was found to be unsuitable and her rights were terminated. I say forcefully, because the grandmother did not have to do any of this. Did you see the part where i said that the grandma has an addiction to adopting children. She tried to adopt my fiance from her mother.
The grandmother adopted my fiance's mother, whom was born to a teenage women. Then the grandmother tried to adopt my fiance from her mother when her mother was in another state and the grandmother was only supposed to be watching her. Then my fiances child was adopted by the grandmother. This women has been taking children from their parents her entire life. She knows what she is doing, and like i said the grandfather is a really good attorney. I don't know how they did it, but all 3 adoptions that this women has been a part of should not have taken place. She has a problem, where she needs somebody to depend on her.
There is no hidden agenda in this scenario. I can understand that you all would question it, but I am trying to give you everything I have. And like I said, I have the same story from all parties.
My fiance, her mother, father, sister and brother have all said on many occasions that they will only go to the grandmothers funeral to make sure she is dead.
**none of this is an embellishment, but i can understand if you would think so**
I don't think anyone is questioning whether you are telling the truth, but whether your fiancee is being completely honest (or even just completely objective) with you. I am guessing that this has to do with some parts of the story you have shared not making sense to those who have dealt a lot with adoption systems and processes.
The way you first described this was that grandmother adopted your fiancees son "by force." She would not be able to make that happen; a judge has to terminate parental rights before they can approve an adoption. You say that this did happen, so it was not the grandmother who made the choice. Judges cannot terminate parental rights simply because someone is homeless. Social services might be involved if the child is in an unsafe environment, and part of their responsibility would be to help the parent find suitable housing. They might do that by helping them get into a family shelter, public housing, state financial assistance, or some other manner. However, if your fiancee left her child with her grandmother when she left the house, she did abandon her child. The courts would still have to serve her with paperwork regarding TPR, which she would have the opportunity to contest and, if necessary, be provided with a case plan that she would have to follow in order to regain custody. If she did not contest, did not do so in the appropriate time frame, or did not follow the case plan, then her rights could be terminated. The obstacles may have seemed insurmountable to her, but there is a process that had to be followed.
There are a number of different issues with the paternity testing. First, as others have said, the courts generally (depending on the state) will terminate all known or unknown birthfather's rights; this means that, even if he did not know that he was the father, a man's rights can be terminated and he cannot come back and contest years later. It may seem unfair, but there are good reasons for this. As unfair as it may be to a birthfather, it would be even more unfair to a child to be left in limbo forever because the birthfather is not known or not named or to be uprooted from the only family they know and placed with a biological parent years after the fact. Also, even if a birthfather were able to gain rights or custody, that would not restore your fiancees parental rights. If that were the case, the father would gain custody and your fiancee would still have no rights to the child, because parental rights are separate from the adoption.
smith2525
The point was that if the father is somebody who's rights were not terminated, then maybe he could do something about her son. But that is what we are trying to get answered.
5 years later,I doubt you'll get anywhere with that.Since she abondon her baby,he would be likely to get custody,if their was away.If the lawyer followed the law,then all potential fathers would be out of question.I'm sorry,but what you've been told sounds ridiculous or very sad.
Does this potential father even know about the baby,or is this away,for u guys to try to disrupt the adoption.
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ruth74
I don't think anyone is questioning whether you are telling the truth, but whether your fiancee is being completely honest (or even just completely objective) with you. I am guessing that this has to do with some parts of the story you have shared not making sense to those who have dealt a lot with adoption systems and processes.
The way you first described this was that grandmother adopted your fiancees son "by force." She would not be able to make that happen; a judge has to terminate parental rights before they can approve an adoption. You say that this did happen, so it was not the grandmother who made the choice. Judges cannot terminate parental rights simply because someone is homeless. Social services might be involved if the child is in an unsafe environment, and part of their responsibility would be to help the parent find suitable housing. They might do that by helping them get into a family shelter, public housing, state financial assistance, or some other manner. However, if your fiancee left her child with her grandmother when she left the house, she did abandon her child. The courts would still have to serve her with paperwork regarding TPR, which she would have the opportunity to contest and, if necessary, be provided with a case plan that she would have to follow in order to regain custody. If she did not contest, did not do so in the appropriate time frame, or did not follow the case plan, then her rights could be terminated. The obstacles may have seemed insurmountable to her, but there is a process that had to be followed.
There are a number of different issues with the paternity testing. First, as others have said, the courts generally (depending on the state) will terminate all known or unknown birthfather's rights; this means that, even if he did not know that he was the father, a man's rights can be terminated and he cannot come back and contest years later. It may seem unfair, but there are good reasons for this. As unfair as it may be to a birthfather, it would be even more unfair to a child to be left in limbo forever because the birthfather is not known or not named or to be uprooted from the only family they know and placed with a biological parent years after the fact. Also, even if a birthfather were able to gain rights or custody, that would not restore your fiancees parental rights. If that were the case, the father would gain custody and your fiancee would still have no rights to the child, because parental rights are separate from the adoption.
Ageed,U said it so much better then me.
Somebody correct me if I'm wrong, but I think when the adoption is granted, all potential fathers' rights are terminated. If not, then adoptions could be interrupted several years down the road and adoptive families would never feel at peace. I know with TJ, all "potential" fathers' rights were terminated along with the presumed father's rights.