Help!

unfortunately, you might have to wait for a different baby. Many courts will place with a sibling because it would be in the best interests of both children. Here, it would be very common for a judge to move an infant to the home of a sibling

Same here; a family with a bio sibling would have first priority if no family members are willing/ appropriate.

By law it never states that. It states after there is no family, then the Foster family gets to adopt. Well my wife and I are the Foster family. The thing is he has other siblings out there. Which are with different families.

I know you don't want to hear this, but fact is, if a family, related or not, adopted previous sibling/siblings, that family will get contacted, and if they are interested, they will receive the baby. I know this is incredibly hard on you guys, and I'm sorry. Now, if the other families who have siblings decline, then you, as the foster parent are going to be considered.

I understand but why give him to us for 6 weeks first. The other Foster family had to think about it. So lets take him from everything hes knows and start over with a new family. I just think the system for Foster care can be screwed up.

Yeah, I know. I'm just going to speculate here of what could be going on: 1. They really do want the baby, but are not active foster parents anymore, meaning, they have to get re-certified again, before the baby can get placed with them. 2. They really don't want the baby, maybe their other kids are older, but they need time to think this over.... Do you know anything about the other family? Maybe they are being pressured by birthmom, to 'safe' the baby from growing up in foster care?.... Can you openly speak with your cw, ask, what is going on? Maybe mention, that you would be willing to have some kind of contact, email pics or whatnot, so the other family (and your child) have an opportunity to know of each other, should they decide to decline placement. We were in exactly the same situation as you. We got the call for a newborn baby girl, asked, if we would be willing to adopt her, My first question was: what about family? I was told, family is not an option, that there is an adoptive family, that adopted 2 previous half siblings, but not to worry... Ok, so we said yes. Next thing we knew, we were told the other family wants placement, and are working on their icpc. This was 3 months into the case. What we didn't know , was , birthmom 'grooming' that family, telling them horrendous false stories about us, so they really didn't want the baby, but felt obliged to safe her from us.. 6 months into the case, and baby was still here...icpc was done, and they never even asked to MEET her!!!! They are in another state, but only 1 1/2 hours away.. We were in constant fear of losing her....so I wrote a letter to the judge, all the caseworkers / supervisors, all the lawyers. I basically told them how much we love this little girl, how she is not only part of our family, but also a almost twin sister to our son ( he is 4 months older), I asked them to consider attachment, and the trauma of disruption of attachment, yes, even with babies it's traumatizing to lose everything they ever knew... And then I asked them to come to a decision, one way or another, but if they decide, to move baby, to do it gently, to order visits, in stages, so baby knows her new family, knows their voices, smells, how they look etc. I attached a picture of the baby to the letters. I wanted them to SEE HER, I didn't want her to just be a file #. One week after I mailed the letters, the other family withdrew their icpc . Unbeknownst to us, the cw had shared my letter with them. The other mom cried...she had no idea we loved our littles so much, she had no idea we wanted to adopt her, ...all she knew, was, what lies Bm had told her. We did a lot of praying in those month...more then usual. Im not saying your case goes this way, or that way. But try to keep your frustration under wraps, communicate with people, pray , if you're the praying kind, and then really trust that what shall be will be. Best wishes to you and your wife.

Ianhovey what ever happened with your case? Did you get to keep the baby?