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In asking this, I'm assuming the single parent has enough space, money, time, etc... I've seen posts on this site of single parents adopting large sibling groups (3, 4, or even more) domestically, but not internationally. I know this would probably depend on the country, but has anyone heard of any rules that prevent this? Even if it's technically allowed, would single parents be considered at all for large sibling groups? I realize agencies would rather place children, and especially sibling groups, in two parent homes, but when there's no two parent homes available, I think a one-parent home would be better than no home at all. Granted, I wouldn't seriously consider this for quite a while, but if it matters, I would have no problem adopting older children and/or mild to moderate special needs kids.
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Large sibling groups, and particularly groups with at least one child ten or over and male, are considered very, very hard to place with ANY family. We are not talking about healthy infant twins or triplets here. We are talking about groups of three or more children, at least some of whom are of school age and at least some of whom are male; Americans overwhelmingly want to adopt girls. While these groups may be listed as healthy, the older a child is and the longer he/she has been in an orphanage or foster care setting, the more likely it is that he/she has been exposed to negative life experiences that can cause emotional problems and behaviors that do not work well in a family. And large sibling groups often have extra issues related to extreme poverty, life on the streets, older children serving as de facto parents to the younger ones, etc. Even if a country or agency has rules concerning single parents -- and I'm unaware of any country that forbids singles to adopt sibling groups at this time, if it accepts singles at all -- it is likely to grant a waiver if a well-qualified single is willing to adopt a hard to place group. By well-qualified, I don't just mean a person with lots of money and a big house. The person will need a great deal of understanding of family dynamics and the issues involved with older child adoption, including such things as bullying and sexual acting out. He/she will need a good social support system, as well as lots of free time. He/she will need good insurance that covers both physical and mental health issues. And he/she will truly need to deal with the fact that a sibling group may be used to managing their own lives and that they will not necessarily welcome a parent telling them to trust him/her and insisting that they behave in certain ways. I'm an old single Mom, and I love parenting. I've enjoyed helping my daughter grow from toddler to teenager. But I must admit that I don't think I could handle an adoption involving, say, four kids of either gender, ranging from six to 14, who would come into my life all at once. It takes a very, very special person to undertake such an adoption, and my hat is off to anyone -- single or married -- who is willing to do such an adoption and who succeeds in making it work. Sharon