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Adoptions & Relocation
So, we are currently in a holding pattern with life. Jobs/location could change in the near future or in a couple of years. (Government contracts & such don't ensure job locations!)
We are exploring options domestic infant vs embryo donation. I'm honestly not sure I'm a good candidate for embryo donation/adoption but I'm thinking about looking into it a little more. Given that if I'm pregnant the baby goes with me no paper work required!
We would prefer to complete a domestic infant adoption. I'm not interested in wasting money but, I'm also not interested in wasting more time when our little one could be out there! We have even found a couple agencies we like both local & national. Before asking them these questions I though I would see if anyone out there has experienced adoption & relocation. (Maybe military folks or others in jobs that have the potential to relocate every few years.)
Situations I could think of and my thoughts/ideas, Please chime in with any constructive ideas or information.
+Moving after home study but before match or placement:
-I know that if we move before a Match or Placement we would have to do the home study over. From what I can tell if we work with a national agencies &/or one licensed in our current state/location and our future residence it won't be as complex. We would just be put on 'hold' until we could get the new home inspected and records updated to meet the new state requirements.
+Post Match but, Pre-placement?
I'm guessing this would greatly depend on the time line and how similar the state requirements. I'm guessing it could mean one of 3 things:
- losing the match
- Rushing to get all the new paper work/ Home Study done approved in the new location.
-One of us having to stay behind, possibly in a temp rental (of course this requires its own update.) Hopefully just until new Home Study/ICPC could be completed/approved.
+After placement but before finalization then what???
-Again I'm guessing time line related. Could be as 'easy' as holding on to our official residence for a few weeks or months. or Maybe one of us staying behind for a few weeks or months in a rental.
-If it was very early in the process then I guess we would have to see if we could do a 2nd ICPC & Home Study. (I know we can get permission to 'travel' with the little one during this time. So, I guess keeping 2 residences wouldn't be the end of the world but cost wise and family bonding wise it would be hard.)
Of course if we know we will be moving in a few months we would just wait. But, sometimes its more of a in the next 6-36 months type of thing. While I know it can take a long time to be matched it takes even longer it you never start the process!
Please feel free to PM or e-mail me directly.
Molly
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Post match and pre placement would also require the agreement of the expectant parents. I wouldn't have agreed to that in a match.
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belleinblue1978
Post match and pre placement would also require the agreement of the expectant parents. I wouldn't have agreed to that in a match.
Of course we would be upfront but if our notice to relocate comes after paperwork and revoke period is over then the child is in the legal custody of the agency and physical custody of the adoptive parents. So, while communication may happen I'm not sure they have any legal say in the matter.
It is not ideal for anyone to relocate for work with a new baby. We would like to be in one place at least though the first year and for finalization. In our current state courts are backed up and while only 6 months waiting is required it often takes 8-12 months to finalize adoption. That is big window of time so we just want to see if anyone has atcually had to move and how it was handled.
I'm sure some eparents might not want a long distance match while it might appeal to others. We will most likely be matched (90%) with eparents living in a different state. We also will be clear that unless we make it back to our hometown there are more then likely a few more moves in our familys future.
Anyway, anyone out there had to move or have one spouse move at some point along the adoption process?
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Of course if it is after tpr and revocation they don't, but they certainly do before baby is born, which is what I was referring to.
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belleinblue1978
Of course if it is after tpr and revocation they don't, but they certainly do before baby is born, which is what I was referring to.
Absolutely, of course we would honor the eparents and respect there choices if this came up during the match. After all it has to be the right fit for everyone.
Our hope it that if we need to relocate that it it either comes before a official match or we could be settled in the new place & get everything updated before birth (amusing eparents are okay with everything.)
We will know in the next few months if we will have to move this year. If we are for sure moving before the end of the year we will just wait. But, if things are not so clear I guess we will start the process and take our chances.
I'm trying to research the legal & red tape about moving while in the process. Not sure what paper work & such has to be completed or how this could extend the time line.
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