Background of adoptive parents

You're going to find all kinds of families on here who've adopted...and some thought they would be at a disadvantage for some reason or another (age, marital status, income, sexual orientation, etc.) but bottom line is that it really just depends on what the expectant parents are looking for and who they are drawn to... You could be picked by the first efamily that sees your profile, or you could wait a long time. Some factors that can influence how often you're shown include what you're open to (research smoking and drug exposures and mental illness of the parents so you have the facts to make a decision), race, levels of openness, etc. the more narrow or restrictive, the fewer expectant parents that will meet your criteria. I'm NOT suggesting that you open up your criteria, just explaining. You should only be open to what you feel is best for your family. Even then, you could be picked by the first memo who sees your profile or you could wait. Good luck to you.

I have a daughter who as a teen had a baby and placed him for adoption. She decided the citeria for placement. She picked the family that she thought would be best based on her personal wants/needs for her and him. So there really isn't a way to make yourself more apt to be poicked because you have no way of knowing what anyone is looking for. Some Moms want their child to have siblings, others want their child to be an only or the oldest or youngest, or whatever. Some care about ethnic group, some don't, some are looking for people with lots of extra money, and some don't care about how much money a family makes. Doesn't matter what your marital situation is, your gender, your lifestyle, your orientation, etc. It's a toss up and just like anything, it's personal choice based on factors we can't know. My daughter picked a family of a different ethnic group than her own because they had already adopted a child of her ethnic group and he would have an older sibling. Unfortunately, the adoption is pretty closed, but she does get updates and pics several times a year. There is a potential for her to some time in the future see him in person. I do not think that a young teen has the capacity or logical thought process needed in order to make a decision that means they are giving up things they do not understand yet and in her case she chose a family that did not want personal contact at all. The truth is that it would not harm them in any way if they had allowed at least one personal visit a year.

First, it matters what way you adopt, foster/adopt, domestically, or internationally. Since I only adopted domestically, that is where my information lies. We used both an agency and attorney. First adoption, agency, then attorney to finalize. Second adoption, attorney. Most agencies have stiffer rules usually than attorneys regarding age, wealth, marriage status and family size. Our agency had a marriage status rule, man/woman and certain number of years married, certain number of income based on how many family members, family size, and diagnosis of infertility. Our attorney did not have any rules except that we had to pass our homestudy. We were able to ask the social worker questions before we worked with the social worker about any concerns we had. We did not have to own our house (even though we did), just show that we could afford it, and afford us and an additional child. So with our first adoption, we were picked by the biological mom because we did not have any kids, and she felt like we were the most honest couple. That we did not keep saying like the other couples that we would do whatever she wanted about education, name, religion, etc. With our second adoption, first thing she said she noticed is that we liked the same football team, already had a child since she wanted a sibling for the baby, and lived locally. Sadly, each adoption is going to be different because each expectant mom is going to be different. Just be you. Good luck!

First, it matters what way you adopt, foster/adopt, domestically, or internationally. Since I only adopted domestically, that is where my information lies. We used both an agency and attorney. First adoption, agency, then attorney to finalize. Second adoption, attorney. Most agencies have stiffer rules usually than attorneys regarding age, wealth, marriage status and family size. Our agency had a marriage status rule, man/woman and certain number of years married, certain number of income based on how many family members, family size, and diagnosis of infertility. Our attorney did not have any rules except that we had pass our homestudy. We were able to ask the social worker questions before we worked with the social worker about any concerns we had. We did not have to own our house (even though we did), just show that we could afford it, and afford us and an additional child. So with our first adoption, we were picked by the biological mom because we did not have any kids, and she felt like we were the most honest couple. That we did not keep saying like the other couples that we would do whatever she wanted about education, name, religion, etc. With our second adoption, first thing she said she noticed is that we liked the same football team, already had a child since she wanted a sibling for the baby, and lived locally. Sadly, each adoption is going to be different because each expectant mom is going to be different. Just be you. Good luck!

Our first match, which fell through, she told the agency that she liked our dogs.The second match (our daughter) I don't know how she picked us, but the agency was certainly pushing us after the failed match. I know she wanted a family that wasn't able to have children. I think the important thing is to be yourself in your profile that the emoms look at. Each will have their own criteria and you'll have the best opportunity for openness if your honest and real in the information you provide.

The question you ask is a good one . I probably am the last person that can or should answer your question . But for my two cants The answer is depending on the type of adoption , the mother is going for . As you most likely knows their is several types. Then the other thing you must remember and take into consideration. Is how the b-mom was raised , what her thoughts are as to what makes a perfect parent for her child. Shes not just popping out an object . She is giving up a part of her . Some give their child up so they can have a better life . So they will tend to lean towards upper income. Some want their baby to go to parents with experience. Some need to get theirs adopted fast so they make a quick judgement. Then you have the ones that do a lot of checking and corresponding with the potential family. But they all have the same thing in common they want their child to go to a loving and caring home.