An Adoptees Final Letter

For years these questions have been on my mind patiently waiting to be answered in time One day I knew I would seek the truth and find answers when I searched for you One day those papers came in the longest wait there had ever been I found a quiet place where no one would the raw emotion spill out of me The cards were stacked against your young life I wanted to tell you it would be alright You had tougher times than many have seen not to mention you were only a teen I'm not upset about the drugs you used When I was young I had problems too Did you give up or are you a fighter like me? You are the force that pushed me to succeed I broke the cycle I know exist but can't see My parents steered me clear of the penitentiary I was told about you struggles when I was 17 two years later you were the goal that kept me clean I wanted to make sure you were proud of me so I waited exactly one year to the day to proceed Dreams of a reunion where I could see your face we would meet someday and share an embrace As a child I caught glances and wondered if it was you Come to think about it, you may have done the same thing too I never imagined this path would lead to pain not getting answers drives me insane You never signed up for me to be able to find you but I can't be sure you even knew what to do I still remember getting the call that day the most painful day of my life I'd say My whole life I thought you were out there waiting for me maybe it was a safeguard that kept me happy When the answers are none the pain is real I just can't help but wonder how you feel I wish I could turn away and move on with my life but my heart won't allow it when I try That sounds so weak coming from me a man who overcame extreme adversities If you don't want me to find you, whatever the reason may be do me a favor and sign up to the registry Send me a few pictures, a reason, and my medical history give me some closure and set me free It would be selfish of you to withhold the answers to who I am Just so you know I beat the odds and became a successful man I grew into quite an attractive guy I'd like to thank you for my beautiful eyes If you are running from dealing with the pain I can assure you there is relief in finally facing this thing I don't want money and won't judge your life I just wonder if we are the same inside It really shouldn't be like this so many adoptees at the end of their wits Withheld information is like a slap in the face when our identity is sealed by the state Black marks all over the information we can't see sentences marked so bad we can't read That's all many of us will know of our history The adoptee is the victim through anonymity This is not just my story you know there are thousands of us walking this road We need to make some changes that support the adoptee It should be a right, but lawmakers have no empathy They should strap on these shoes and talk a walk if they did we wouldn't be having this talk In so many ways adoptees are unique we share the same empty spot way down deep For years I thought this was just a flaw with me until I started speaking with other adoptees It's no longer my secret so I'll keep it real You are not alone in the way you feel.