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Hi everyone!
I haven't posted in a long time but wanted to put some feelers out there. We've been growing increasingly annoyed with DYFS and the system this past year. We are foster to adopt but our placements never last very long. Our last 4 placements were here a combined 4 months with longest one being here 7 weeks.
On 10/1 we were placed with a 1 week old baby girl whose mother left the hospital 2 hours after giving birth. She told the hospital she would be back later that day but never returned. I am told that they can't consider FD a Safe Haven baby because the hospital had bio-mom's info and she said she'd be back. So, DYFS has to try and track her down. Does that sound right?
Her case has been taken over by a permanency worker who we finally heard from today. They still have not located bio-mom and they go to court tomorrow, from what I'm told, "just to update the judge".
So far, no family members on bio-mom's side are interested in her. Bio-dad is a registered sex offender and LG told me he's out as far as getting custody of her. His mother already has 3 of his other children and she has told the LG that she can't handle any more.
All the workers I've been talking to say they've never seen a case like this. Has anyone here seen anything like this?
This is definitely not a Safe Haven case- babies must be abandoned at a designated Safe Haven destination to meet this criteria, and since she was born in a hospital with a known mom, she isn't Safe Haven.
If biomom does not contact DCPP for six months, it could be considered an abandonment case; since there are known relatives, they would have to be ruled out for placement.
My little guy was abandoned at the hospital- biomom returned to name him, then left for several months. Bios did not avail themselves to DCPP, but did eventually contact them to visit baby when he was 6 months old.
Hang in for the fost-adopt roller coaster.
Congrats on your placement. Best of luck.
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It is not Safe Haven because they know who she is. BUT it sounds hopeful, in terms of the mom's nuttiness and the dad's criminal past. It just depends on if you can hang in there for the DYFS roller coaster. While you decide, love on your little one.
Smell the top of her little head for me:)
Thank you both for replying. They have been telling us that this is as close to Safe Haven as we can get but none of the workers down here have ever seen a case like this. Every time I remind my mom about all the "ifs" that can happen she calls me Debbie Downer so we've decided to just stay positive, no negative thoughts and pray... A LOT!
P.S. The top of her head smells wonderful! ;-)
i too had a little one straight from the hospital as mom just left after delivering. they had some info on mom but after leaving the hospital mom never saw baby again. i was up to adopt but last minute the family that adopted her sister ended up adopting her as well. it is a crazy ride(but so worth it). if the mom is mia and dad couldnt get the baby, family can always step up but it sounds like they are maxed out. if there are no other siblings being adopted where those families would want to adopt this little one too then my friend it looks like you may be first in line to adopt and the circumstances may make it all go a little faster as well. best wishes.
I recently adopted a "safe haven baby"-bio mom went to hospital-knew of the safe haven program-indicated she wanted to do that (she spoke very little english-they ended up getting a translator)-had the baby & left against medical advice about an hour after giving birth. This was not a straight safe haven either-as the hospital had moms name & address-even though they weren't supposed to. She never saw baby, held or fed her. While she could have come back (no other family would have been allowed to claim her & dad was unkown) up till the day we adopted she didn't & our adoption was final @ 7 months & 5 days of having her. Best of luck & keep us posted
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Well, we are 6 1/2 months now with our angel and still no contact from bm. She was eventually found in January because she was arrested on an outstanding warrant. CW met with her and there was one hearing for FD while she was in custody. We found out that hearing was supposed to be for permanancy but DCP&P had to withdraw the request since they found bm. While in custody she told CW she had "a change of heart" and wanted a picture of the baby. She was released 6 weeks ago and has yet to contact with the division. LG confirmed this. We go back to court this week. The fact finding hearing has been postponed twice, if bm no-show's LG says it's likely to be postponed again. So frustrating as I know you all know!
From what I was told, in order to be Safe Haven the bm has to have the baby outside of the hospital then go to the emergency room to turn the baby over. In this case, bm had the baby in the hospital then left and never came back. In order to get abandonment, the law says there has to be no "reasonable effort" by the bp's for a minimum of 6 months.