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Hello friends. I am currently searching out my birth mom a little more actively. Catholic Charities wants $800 just to start facilitating the process and I figured the internet would be a great place to start. I have a family and that's a lot of dough for a maybe, especially with NJ's new law set to take effect in 2 years. Upon signing into this site I saw that a user had posted a while back that they were looking for their son, born the same day/time/location as me. Tried contacting them but nothing back. I don't even know if its still an active profile or when it was created. Any help or resources you can give would be great. I cant believe CC gouging us like that in the age of information. They could track a person down in an hour these days. Thanks! -Greg
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Have you thought of signing up with the state of NJ Mutual Consent Adoption Registry until the new law goes into effect? Not sure if any pertinent info has changed Kind regards, Dickons
New Jersey DYFS Adoption Registry New Jersey Search and Reunion Forum Division of Youth and Family Services Adoption Registry Unit 966 50 E. State St., PO Box 717 Trenton, NJ 08625 (609) 292-9139
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$800 just to start the process? Yikes! Feels more like a business than like a charity, no? You can sign up for the Soundex registry at [url=http://www.isrr.org]International Soundex Reunion Registry - ISRR[/url] - if someone's been searching for you and has also registered there, the system will make the match and alert you both. That's free. Does Catholic Charities also charge a fee for providing non-identifying information? That might be worth having, if it's free or cheap. It can help you confirm a match you make on your own... As for the person searching here with your birth date/place, that had to have made your heart skip a beat when you saw it. I'm not sure where on this site you saw that post, or how old/new it is, so I'm not sure what to suggestion. You could try sending a private message to the person who created the post, if you haven't already. Someone else who's used this site more might have better suggestions, though... If you're interested, there's a once a month support group meeting for people in the adoption triad in NJ. I'm in NJ myself, and I go most months. The organizers are adoptees who've been in reunion for a while, and they're good resources for search ideas. If you'd like info on the group, send me a private message and I'll give you details. Good luck in your search!
Thank you both for the info. I'll definitely get on both of these registries. Luckily, I have the non-identifying info. They wanted $200 just for that! Crooks... I appreciate the invite to the group. I live in CA now, so I don't think that will be possible. The posting was within a profile. The profile belonged to: User 245304 Does that mean they wanted to keep their name anonymous? Or does it mean that the profile isn't active?
gmo, This is just a guess - the registry has been around for about 15 years or so...they probably didn't enter a user name so the posting is just the computer number. I saw the posting and it's so old it doesn't have a date, pretty sure they upgraded the database over the years and some aren't as accurate as they could be - people are also scared to put their name on the internet even to this day. The fact that there was a search that matched your details is what made me suggest the NJ Registry because fingers crossed - they found out it existed. Even if they registered with it - there isn't a guarantee they would match to you (likely but not guaranteed) NJ law allowed your place of birth in NJ to be changed to match your adoptive parents residence at the time of adoption (if you were born in NJ and adopted in NJ is my understanding). Do you know if your parents changed it (they might have been told it was normal who knows? The new law stops that from being legal btw... Kind regards, Dickons PS - you should post your search on this registry too - they may check it on a regular basis - who knows.
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