Birth mom, knows who adopted son is, scared to contact

Leah, what do you have to lose? You can either let it all go and move on with your life wondering or you can take a step in love for your son and pursue the answer to all your questions. Your son, whatever his status is, deserves to know you. You are kin, blood. You have much information to release including medical records which are so very important for his life. As far as the adoptive parent(s), you can be gentle with them but your son has the ultimate decision at the age of 18 to decide what kind of relationship he wants with you. Choosing to do this yourself or with an intermediator I cannon comment. Good luck and pray because God WILL give you the open door if it is His desire for you to be reunited with your son.