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I need some help here. We went into this wanting to adopt a girl younger than our 7 year old daughter. We have 3 boys aged 17, 15, and 12, and a little girl 7. Well, agency calls and says they have a great girl who will be going to adoptions and wanted us to keep her for the night so we could get to know her but she is 9. Were we willing to try? We were hesitant but said for 24 hours we'd try it. Well she walked into this house and of course we thought she was amazing! Bossy, sassy, but sweet and adorable. Not what we expected or planned for. We envisioned a younger girl who my daughter would be a role model for. Not an older girl who my daughter would be looking up to. We envisioned someone who knew they were up for adoption. She doesn't know and would find out until after being with us and I'm hung up on that. She also has a stepdad who she loves and who loves her that she visits. I planned on closed and didn't plan on liking or considering an open adoption. Nothing is what I planned! But we can't stop thinking about her and she is being booted from her current foster home. I'm starting to realize that maybe nothing goes as planned and maybe God has the plan? LOL I know all this but I had a list of acceptable situations. :rolleyes:
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Yes ma'am! Sometimes nothing goes as planned. I am going into this Foster-to-Adopt situation with a plan in mind, but I know that things may end up being much different than what I'm aiming for. If you feel like this little girl belongs to your family, despite her being a bit older than you wanted, then I say continue to let her remain in your home. In terms of a closed adoption, if the stepdad is a huge part of her life, and she feels the need to maintain contact with him, then let her! As long as you all have set boundaries and can agree on them I think everything can workout for the better. Best of luck to ya!
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We ended up not feeling we were a good fit for her but we enjoyed our time with her.