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So the GAL came today and he also tried to talk up guardianship. My question was, "If the judge slammed the door on a goal change, why would she turn around and grant guardianship?" He thinks time in care is forcing desperation on all fronts. I have a feeling they are planning on going into court and playing up the good relationship we have with mom. They will mention that we have been supervising visits for a year. Blah, blah, blah. He did admit that we have been right all along about trying for adoption on Pumpkin when mom has had baby brother at home for 9 months. But when we asked about some of the things that can go wrong with guardianship, he just said he'd never seen one overturned. Hello..once it goes to guardianship he will no longer be on the case!
Knowing that I was in unknown territory, I got in contact with an old foster friend of mine. She and her DH went through MAPP classes with myself and my DH. She was placed with a baby girl at the same time we were placed with Nugget. While we were adopting Nugget, they were going through their third TPR attempt. It was denied and guardianship put in place after 3.5 years, by then we were adopting Chuckles. At any rate, I told her what was happening with Pumpkin and asked her how her experience with guardianship was going. Her first words to me were, "hire a lawyer, and do it now." Yikes! She said she is stuck having by-weekly visits with the bio-mom and that the woman hates her. She is constantly threatening to take them to court to get the daughter back. She has taken them to court over visitation. Some of the visits have ended in fights. She said it's been a nightmare and her little girl is acting out big time. She said they looked into a lawyer and it would cost them $10,000 to get the court ordered visits changed or try to terminate rights on their own. She said guardianship is nothing more than foster care without any of the assistance.
What's funny is that the CW and GAL both have told us we should not have to do any more than once a month visits and more likely would end up with quarterly. Hmmm. This from the same people that were confident they would get a goal change. The only guardianships I am familiar with are family (grandparents) and all those cases ended with the children going back to the parents. What I do know is that mom has a history of turning on and burning bridges with people. Now I'm afraid to agree to guardianship and at the same time afraid that the judge will deny it and just turn Pumpkin over with no transition. GAL said it's possible due to time in care.
If anyone has any experience on this, I would GREATLY appreciate any input.
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I would not take a guardianship in your situation. I took guardianship of Niece a few months ago, but I am in a different situation. Even still, let me tell you what happens after guardianship...I get no money from the state AT ALL. Niece gets no services (health, therapy, nothing). Thank goodness, I have good insurance. Since the guardianship was established I got one phone call and one follow up email from CPS. That's it-no other help.My biggest fear is that since the guardianship was ostensibly voluntary (bios agreed to it on eve of TPR), there is no judicial finding of unfitness, so they have every legal right to sue me for visitation and/or change in custody at any time. They will have an uphill battle on custody change, but I can see some clueless judge awarding visitation just to keep the "relationship between parent and child." I do have some protections legally given my situation...bios have not contacted Niece in over a year and she is 16 years old, an age where no one can really MAKE her do anything against her will. You do not have that protection. Pumpkin is a toddler and her mother is parenting her brother with CPS blessings. She has made some efforts to continue to see her and try to get her back. Let CPS fight that battle. You do not need to be in Court every other month,
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We are in the process of getting guardianship and my understanding is we will receive a continued stipend and assistance. I don't know how accurate this is since we have some months before it is all final but I think you should look into what your state does for Guardianship. I would agree with the rest that Mom could sue you for custody later and although you would probably win since in order for her to win back custody she would need to show she is better able to take care of the child than you are but you could spend quite a bit in attorneys fees to win that fight.
@Always, I have already been informed that guardianship will come with no benefits for Pumpkin and she will have to be put on our insurance. As Confused is showing, it is the case with most guardianships. Only a handful of states do offer the same benefits as foster care. And those are reserved for family members in order to preserve family ties. There is a movement trying to extend the practice to more states, but again only as an incentive for family to take permanent placement. I have mixed feelings about that. Money is definitely not our deciding factor on guardianship. It's a bonus, as with both our boys we adopted. What bothers me is being stuck co-parenting for the next 16 years vs having an open adoption. Mom may have no legal say-so over medical and other decisions, but that won't stop her from voicing her negative opinion about them. She could take us to court over them. If things get nasty, I can't just stop visits. I understand that it's not the same as joint custody. We may not have to worry about being in court or mediation over every trivial issue. Just the possibility of it happening at all is giving me reservations.I guess all I can do at this point is to keep voicing those reservations to the CW and GAL between now and January. I can wait until the last minute to refuse. Hopefully there will be a better idea about reunification by then. Good luck to them finding another home willing to take on this setup without all the background. My guess is it would force reunification if we refused. But the next four months is a long time to be in hot water with the county.
Don't know about this. I found it interesting that it was the GAL who addressed guardianship with you and not the agency caseworker. Sounds like you were not at court. Given mom had the other child and that the court "continues" to keep this one in care, and per the GAL the judge is open to guardianship, I don't know. When probed, the GAL said in past experience none were overturned. This is interesting and I personally would hold off as it should become clearer by the timeline they gave.
It was I, in fact, that first used the word guardianship. I asked the CW months ago when expressing my doubts that TPR was possible if she thought this would end in us being asked to take guardianship. I told her then that I hadn't heard great things about it. She blew it off with assurances that the case would end in adoption. Court rolls around last month and the county had their rears handed to them by the judge. We were there to witness it, as we have been for every hearing. Next home visit, all of a sudden she comes at us asking if we would agree to guardianship. Now she and the GAL are blowing off our concerns and trying to convince us what a great option it is. As if this too is a done deal. We've had our opinions and concerns blown off since we found out mom was pregnant with baby brother. We keep turning out to be right, yet they still will not listen to us.
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Hi. I'm new to the group. I wanted some advice please. I have had my granddaughter since birth. Her mother and father (my son) were both drug addicts and left her after they brought her home. My son went to jail and will be incarcerated for the next 3 years and the mother left and was gone for 24 months. She basically left when my granddaughter was 7 months old. First someone reported them and OCS came and took my granddaughter and she was gone for 3 days and then placed with us. The mother had 15 months to put together and comply with a case plan and didn't. She shows up 24 months later pregnant and goes in to immediate treatment and now everyone is jumping around making it all about HER. We were supposed to go to court to terminate rights and me to adopt (my granddaughter calls me Momma) and now it's moved to trying for guardianship. They are saying it's because she's Alaska Native and since the governor signed the bill for all villages to have rights over any children in the system of native decent. My granddaughter is 25%, 50% Caucasian (whatever that means), and 25% Mexican. The only side that matters is the native side. The mother is about to get out of treatment and has decided to move in with the father of the baby (known drug addict) and yet, I have to do visits that are convenient for her and basically work around her schedule. Even OCS is jumping when they say jump. WTH????? I have no rights because I don't have actual custody. OCS does until the guardianship goes through I guess. What is wrong with all this. What about what's best for the child????