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Hey adoptive parents! How "loud" do you have to be about adoption for it to be intentionally discussed? I ask, because we really thought we were completely open - never making a big deal about adoption (we have adopted and biological kids) but never making it a secret either. Then one day, our daughter who is 4 years younger than our adopted son, came home from school completely heart broken. Someone at school told her that her brother is adopted. She demanded to know why none of us told her. It was such a shock! Of course, we never wanted to make it a big deal because we love him like we love the rest ... but apparently we didn't make big ENOUGH of a deal. What do you do to keep talk of adoption going without singling out a child?
Create a lifebook with the adoption story in it and then every year, on your adoption anniversary, add a new page in that talks about how they feel about it each year, they can also add in life things to the page, like how tall you are now, who your best friend is, where you went on vacation, how you feel about your family and home, if you had any questions or thoughts about being adopted. Every year you open that book and read from start to finish as a family adding in the new year at the end. When they are 18 or 21 years they will have all those memories and feelings to look back on.
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It might be fun to create a tradition in the family where everyone's "origin stories" are shared on their birthdays.