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So I often hear people say that you should never adopt because you want to "save" a child (from foster care, from an orphanage, etc.) These people contend that you should only adopt because you want another child in your family. I can see where the anti-savers are coming from . . . parents who perceive themselves as having saved their kids will likely have unlikely/unhealthy expectations for gratitude and perfect behavior from their kids. On the other hand, it doesn't seem like an entirely bad motivation, either: the desire to help save a child from living in an institution, or from bouncing from foster home to foster home, or from aging out and being left to fend for him/herself. And adopting just because you want another child could likely create problems, too, right? Like if the child is challenging and requires a lot of work and effort on your part or disrupts your life, you may resent them for not making your dreams of a perfect family come true. So if you shouldn't adopt because you want to help a kid and you shouldn't adopt because you want a kid, what IS a good reason for adopting?
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I love this question. But I also feel like the answer is really dependent on the family that is choosing to adopt. Only you can decide why adoption is right for you and the growth of your family. I love it when people say that that's just what they were called to do. I believe that family isn't blood and you're going to find some members who belong with you, for whatever reason, and maybe the way you find them is through adoption or fostering. I agree that the "Savior mentality" when it comes to adoption is unhealthy. But I do think the desire to sincerely be of help is different. Part of life is about serving others, and maybe being a parent is part of that.
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