Hellooooo out there!!!

October 31, 2002

it appears there's not been much activity in this forum for a while. I just joined and perhaps there are some "lurkers" who might want to "talk"...

I adopted Vitali at age ten from Talinn and he's been with me since November of last year (the week after T-day!). He's bright, talented, intelligent, eager, athletic, outwardly confident, and handsome! Inside, he's a scared and scarred child who suffered at the hands of alcoholic, abusive, neglectful adults.

The orphanage was a real change of life for him and a bright spot in his life. There was a older woman named Luda who took Vitali and his brother out for weekends and she also earned a warm spot in his heart for her loving care.

In bad moments, he can be ODD, RAD, and PTSD but most of the symptoms are mild. We've got lots of stuff to work on but we're going to get him thru this.

I can't thank the people at the orphange enough for their great care and we plan to visit Luda as soon as we can to make sure she's thanked for all her love.

Devon

Parvenah

October 17, 2003

Hi Devon! How is Vitali doing? Which orphanage in Tallinn did you adopt from? I believe there are several in the city of Tallinn itself.

My daughter was adopted from an orphanage in Viljandi (2 hours from Tallinn), but I know several other parents who have adopted from Tallinn orphanages.

I had the privilege to meet several other parents who have adopted from Estonia. There is such a comfort in talking with these folks and sharing our ideas and challenges.

My daughter has come a long way in her developmental challenges, but she is well on the way to leveling off with her peers. It takes several years sometimes. I just want her to enjoy school, no matter what level she is on.

Did you have any difficulties advocating for Vitali at school?

I hope you are both doing well. Be patient. I found it interesting that once my daughter truly became comfortable with me and our environment she reverted in her behavior, and is now slowly maturing back up to her physical age level. It was a marvel to watch this boomerang in her psyche as she was very quiet and seemed to have no transition problems overtly. However, we all know how fragile the human psyche is and there are always subtle hints of the inner struggles. I feel blessed to be part of her life. People tell me what a lucky little girl she is. But, inside me I am telling them that I am truly the lucky one.

Hope you are both doing fine. Nice to meet another Estonian adoptive parent.

Fond Regards,

Parvenah