"get It All Off Your Chest!!!!!!".........

TO ALL BMOMS, AMOMS AND ADOPTEES: IF GIVEN THE CHOICE, WOULD YOU CHOOSE "ADOPTION" [WHICH REMOVES ALL BIRTH INFORMATION] OR "LEGAL GUARDIANSHIP" [WHICH GIVES ALL PARENTAL RIGHTS, BUT KEEPS ALL BIRTH INFORMATION IN TACT]?.....WHY? OR WHY NOT?.......... :)

I honestly have to say, I would still choose adoption for me, but an open adoption. I would of loved growing up knowing who my birthfamily was and visiting with them over the years. Open adoption gives all parties involved a chance to grow with the child and nurture that child, closed adoption means exactly what it says, the doors are closed, records are closed. no contact. Ever since I made the decision to really try and find my birthfamily a few months ago, I have had panic attacks, have had to go on medication, and for what, all the aggravation that goes along with trying to find out about the beginnings of my life. It bugs me to no end that I have to jump through hoops for my records. Sincerely, Brenda.....

Hello Brenda, I truly appreciate you input in this topic area. It helps me better understand my own circumstance! There may be a lot more to the "panic" and frustration you are experienceing now....more than likely, it is only just beginning to "come out", but has been there for quite some time. I too suffer from similar conditions, which are all "directly" related to my adoptions. I just wanted you to know, that I am available to share, explore, and communicate with you and all others with issues of this nature, at ANY time. You are loved by many and You are NOT alone......... pm messages or write to me at: dynamicentertainment2003@yahoo.com :D God Bless You Always!!!!

Hi Dynamic - Actually I would exactly what we did! We have an open adoption with our sons' birthmother, and a open adoption with an intermediary with their birthfather (so it is more like a semi-open adoption). We correspond with their birthmom and her parents through e-mail, and will continue to send pictures/updates to and from her through the mail. (Our sons are 8 months old and their Birthfamilies live in another country) We have our sons' Original Birth Certificates - but only the abridged, only their birthparents can apply for the unabridged copies, so their birthnames are on the OBC's, but no information on their birthparents (or their length/weight at birth either!), and the court report which has specific information not only on their birthparents but on their entire birthfamilies including their half-brother's names. I've seen many debates on legal guardianship - but haven't had time to read them and don't fully understand the concept. However, from what I've gleaned, legal guardianship is a temporary measure, not a permanent one, and lends itself to coparenting - so I'm not sure I'd be comfortable with that. I'll be interested to see what others have to say. michelle

Your sons sound so beautiful...I would love to hear more about them! I do know a lot about guardianship, since I have done so previously. It is not like "custody" which is "temporary, in fact it is as "permenant" as adoption, with the exception of "stipulated agreement". The courts will stipulate every "contact or non-contact" and the records will reflect such. It also means that no "birth" information will be altered, but "perental" rights to the child are equal to "adoptive parent" rights. Just a bit of "information" for anyone curious! Keep Posting!.. Everyone has a story worth sharing!! :D

Hello:Please check your guardianship laws for your state. Thank you very much for your care and support to others!Warm regards,