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We are planning to adopt a child from Bangalore. And we have identified the child. But due to the insurmountable paperwork and all the legalities we hope to be united by Dec. 2003. But this is my dilemma. I have to go for a wedding to India June 2003. I have the special permission to go and see her at the orphanage. But I am not sure if I will be emotionally strong to go and see her for a day and leave her and come back. I need your thoughts - One part of me says don't go see her..you will be a basketcase. The other half tells me to go see her and you can have the assurance of seeing how she is taken care of.
What should I do???? Has anyone else had this kind of experience. She is 2 years old. Help please.:confused:
Go and see her so she has a mind picture of you. Take her a photo album of her "new" surroundings. Include a picture of all family members (even four legged ones) and a picture of her
room, her home and yard. Take her a doll or something to hug and love until she has you, some clothing items as she probably would need them. This will begin the bonding process.
Your visit would also show her caretakers that you really care, and may prompt them to take extra special care of her. You may want to take her main caretakers a gift (chocolates or something) too. If they are treated like they are valued they may give her special care.
See this time as a gift to begin to become a family. Don't be afraid of hurting, instead see it as the beginning of love. It is also a chance to "claim her as your own". If we don't risk hurt what do we really gain?
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Go see her! I had the chance to see my son in Guatemala for three days last month and I wouldn't trade that time for anything...except maybe having him home now instead of in another month! But believe me, it was so worth it to be able to hold him and kiss him and get a sense of his smell and the way his skin and hair felt, and the way he sounds...that is something that can't be experienced through pictures.
If you don't go, you'll probably regret it and be kicking yourself, so just go! Take pictures of the two of you together and cherish them for the remaining amount of time it takes to bring your daughter home. She will change so much in 6 months that you really should jump at this chance to see her in June instead of in December or whenever she makes it home.
Renee