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My son turns 6 months old on the 5th and it is crashing down hard on me. I have had a problem with anxiety all day today. I just dont know how I am going to deal when it comes to the one year mark but I try not to look that far ahead that only makes it worse. It has really been a moment to moment thing today. It started last night and carried into today then I was ok for a bit and now I am overwhelmed with the fact that half a year has already gone by. This month the pictures are going to be hard and I know it. I want to get them but I am almost scared of how many tears and how much pain is going to come from getting them this time around. All I can do right now is pray for God to hold my head above the water cause right now I dont feel that I can do it on my own and thank the Lord he does it and has promised to always do so. Just cause he does wont and does not mean that my pain is not there.. it is still there less than it would be with out him but it is still there. I just need to get away and be alone and I cant right now so I dont know how I am going to reflect on anything espcial how I am feeling right now. So I resort to writing and I am constintly having my thoughts interupeted so I dont get to really look at what is going on with me. I know I am hurting and I need to heal from this but I cant totally heal If I am not given the chances to or at least give my self the chance
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I can understand to an extent how you feel. I went through that somewhat with my 2 yr old and I'm coming up on my 4 mo old turning 6 mos old in like a month and a half.I'm doing pretty good, making progress and healing, but I'm still dreading the 6 month mark with her to an extent. I'm only making as good a progress as I am because the Lord's helping me through this as well. I'll keep you in my prayers. Sending you hugs. You can send me a PM or e-mail if you'd like to talk sometime. Anne :)
I dont know if I am really dreading it. It is just harder this time around. I have a 2 year old living with my , my precious daughter Tatum. My son is adopted by a wonderful family and is about to turn 6 months old. I think that it is the fact that this is half way to a year soon he is going to be one and I cant be there and babies start doing alot of their major first now and I dont get to see them. I have a lot going on right now and some times it is hard for me to think all I can do is pray and right now that is all I seem to do . It helps God knows I need him right now so....
It will be six months on the 29 of this month (April) since I placed. It is hard to believe that it has been that long. It feels like just yesterday that I was in the hospital. I just miss my boys so much but I know I did what was best for them even though it is not necessarily the best thing for me. I am still dealing with a lot of pain and depression from the placement. Not all days are bad I do have my good days. It is just strange that it has been almost six months. I cant believe that I have made it this far.
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