Domestic relative adoption and then bringing the child here

Letter from my adoption attorney in Manila: Dear Shevon,The law that would apply to your and your husband's proposed adoption ofthe child is the Domestic Adoption Act of 1998.Please do not confuse yourself with the ICAB rules on adoption because itwill not apply to the proposed adoption.Please go to this site for the copy of the Domestic Adoption Act:[url]http://www2.mozcom.com/~kbf/IRR.html[/url]Will email you again tomorrow. In the meantime, please read the DomesticAdoption Act.

Notice your attorney said you will not have to deal with intercountry rules. He didn't say you wouldn't have to deal with the ICAB. But don't be discouraged just because you have to deal with ICAB. If you meet all the requirements, you should be OK. Keep in mind that any adoption in the Philippines is an arduous and time consuming endeavor. Nothing happens fast there. But if you perservere, you will get the child.

Cungar,So can you please tell me in detail how I should proceed?The mother has not yet relinquished the child because we are just starting.I printed off the I-600 and I'm waiting to get more information from the mother to complete it.When does the ICAB get involved? Does this mean we don't have to go through the Philippine courts?Should we go through an agency here in the US rather than an attorney in the Philippines?I really appreciate your help. I am so confused.

Cungar,The problem is that we don't fit the ICAB requirements (as I outlined before, not being 27, etc.)....are you saying we won't need to?

A suggestion I have is that you make sure that the lawyer has: 1) Dealt with multiple international adoptions of relatives. and 2) Knows all the intracacies of the system including ICAB and how to get the child a Visa. A lot of people get false information from lawyers over there and wind up dissapointed. I would first make sure you qualify before you start paying the lawyer.. I'm not sure about the age thing. Although some people have said that you must be Catholic, I'm not sure how that applies to a relative adoption. My agency head says that Catholocism is not a requiirement as long as you are of good moral character. Here' s a link where you will find information on Adoption in the Philippines. [url]http://manila.usembassy.gov/wwwh3205.html[/url] I'm not really an expert but I know I've read that everything goes through ICAB, no matter what.

Hi Shevon, The process is difficult! Your Lawyer is correct. You do have the "option" of filing a petition using the domestic process in the Philippines without involving ICAB. Jurisdiction is an issue for ICAB and as a "non-resident, your case should be transferred to ICAB. Emigration to the US, under the current rules, will prove difficult and lengthy if at least one of you is "not a resident" in the Philippines. There are many relative adoptions that are completed this way and adoptive parents find themselves having to meet the two years co-residency requirement before they can bring their child to the US. If your Lawyer says or thinks this is an easy case, then you might want to explore other counsel options. In any event, as an alien, you do have to meet the "Intercountry requirements". (Via an executive order) What your Lawyer may not be aware of is that it will cost you a minimum of $20,000 and could reach as much as $40,000 or even more to complete the process under the current rules. Your only hope without the adoption costing you that much is adoption reform happen. If I were you, I wouldn't bet on it. You have many requirements to meet and at the very least, your husband will have to spend time in the Philippines meeting the local requirements. In addition, in order to meet the Legal Capacity to Adopt, you will need an agency approved by ICAB to sign off on your child study or have a homestudy complemented to meet the I-600 requirements. Some of the requirements are easy, others are not because of the time and the timing involved. If you have not committed to the adoption, then think long and hard about the consequences. You husband will most likely have to take the lead and establish residency in the Philippines so that you can be given the Adoption Certificate. This adds other immigration requirements for him. This will most likely put a big strain on your marriage. My wife would never allow me to be alone in the Philippines. There is far too much temptation. HTH, Johnny [url]http://www.gov.ph/faqs/adoption.asp[/url]

Thank you johnny I was hoping you would come in with your expert knowledge. Shevon, I totally agree with johnny. We are in an even more precarious position than you. My wife wants to adopt a child who isn't even a relative. This is against Philippines law, but her mother is caring for the child and my wife has fallen in love with the child. We cannot do any of the things that johnny has described nor can we afford that kind of money. But my wife believes she can somehow get around these laws and when i tell her she can't, she gets really angry. It has caused a lot of friction in our marriage. I purposely have kept the child at a distance emotionally because I know there's a possibility she won't be ours. My wife threw caution to the wind and I'm afraid she'll have to find out the hard way. So unless you're willing to make the commitment johnny has described and you are totally devoted to getting this child, think long and hard about what you are getting yourself into. It will only get worse as you become more in love with the child.

Cungar and Johnny,Thank you so much for your posts.I've refused seeing a picture of the child because of this very reason, we don't know how involved we are able to get.Last night my husband told me that he feels ambivalent about me travelling to the Philippines because of problems Americans have had there in the past, especially in Mindinao, where the child is located. Since we both would have to travel, this makes this adoption even less viable.And Johnny, I agree with your wife..I wouldn't want my husband travelling to another country for an extended period of time without me, either. Especially not one teeming with ex-girlfriends.And we just don't meet the inter-country requirements.It's too bad that the process is made so difficult.So, I don't know. I don't think this will happen for us. We could spend 20K..not 40K, and I'm glad you mentioned that as well.Thank you to you both.

Shevon, It's really hard to accept that a beautiful, under privileged child who would flourish in America in a wonderful family can't be brought here but it's just not the way it works. The philosophy in the Philippines is that we can take care of our own but we'll let a couple hundred be adopted every year. It was very wise of you not to bond with the child. I wish my wife had the same choice but unfortunately her mother obtained the little girl and there was no looking back. We don't have any children and are in our 40's so we chose to concurrently adopt from China since that is easier and a lot faster. If it doesn't work out in the Philippines, we will still have a little girl. I'm sorry that I we don't have a way to make it easier but like I said, better to make the decision now than to go through years of heartache. Chuck

Unfortunately the information on adopting a relative from the Philippines is quite limited. So most people usually start the process then realize their knee deep in sh**. If the information is readily available then why do we seek info on an adoption forum? Who really suffers when relative adoption fail? Everyone! The Prospective Adoptive Parents. The child. The community. Everyone in a community based society (the Philippines society is made up of barrios and barangays) would like their children to have a better life. Many of my cousins have moved to Manila, Cebu, and to other countries seeking a better life. For some of us, going through the heartache is our only option. If I give up then i'd be the one letting the community down and i'd never be able to visit a place I once called home.

Interesting. I forwarded this thread and another thread about ICAB to my attorney and she has failed to respond, although in the past she responded daily to my emails. I also find it interesting that she made clear in her proposed agreement that her involvement in the case would end as soon as the Philippines courts allowed us to adopt the child. I asked her to stay involved until there are no impediments to bringing the child to the US. No response. Feeling a little cynical today,

Shevon, If she really has been misleading you and is purposely avoiding telling you about the complications of the international adoption process, shame on her. It's one thing to mislead someone about money matters but to promise someone they can easily adopt a child when it is actually very difficult is just immoral. Your statement that she would only be involved in the Philippines adoption process should be a clue that this could very well be true. Lawyers in the Philippines are often attracted to American clients because they feel they can make a lot of money quick. We are dealing with a lawyer who is a cousin of my wife's who I think is trying to do the same thing. Lots of promises about adopting in the Philippines, no solutions about how to get the child over here. Luckily we haven't paid him anything yet. :D My agency head has the name of a lawyer who has a lot of experience with this type of thing and has dealt with many relative adoptions. I will ask her next time I talk to her and PM you with the information if you want.

Cungar,Oh please do PM me that information if you are able to get it.Thank you so much!

My brother-in-law's lawyer (firm) made a commitment that if he wasnt able to complete the adoption he wouldn't have to pay. It took him 2.5 years including the immigration process at the time there were little or no independent placements were happening through ICAB and certainly, when they boasted they don't work with Lawyers. On the other hand, our lawyer was total sleaze! My wife and I found hot the hard way about lawyers. ItҒs far better to pay more money and get a firm to represent you rather that it is to hire an independent lawyer. Of course, Im sure there must be exceptions.

Johnny,I would be interested in knowing what law firm your brother-in-law used?