Okay....so what about FIFTY-ONE!?!?!?!?

December 15, 2007

Sometime in early 2006, I started the thread, "Do you suppose that 49 is too old?" I'm happily surprised it received so much discussion, and a happier part of that question, was that we received a lovely baby in the winter of 2006! (What a sweetie he is, too! :) )

That said, we honestly thought THIS was it. I mean, c'mon.......this is the fifth infant. We've been doing this since we were 23yrs old and we now have two lovely daughters and baby boy still at home (6yrs, 4yrs and 1yr old baby now).........and heavens, you know....we're gonna be FIFTY ONE this spring.

Really now...some of you who've known me for some time on this site, are thinking, "OF COURSE you'd think about doing this again, Linny! It's YOU we're talkin' about!!!!!!!!!"

Well.....really I thought this was 'it'. While I'm doing fine...one thing I do notice is I can't put the baby in the backpack for very long because he's a pretty hefty guy. (sigh) But, other than the trips to the chiropractor, life is good.

Now, dh has mentioned that he thinks it might be good to put our profile in again and 'if it's to be, it will'. Sounds good, but $$ is VERY tight these days. The future looks better for loosening our money straps, but for the next few months, $$ is tight. I've talked to our agency who will be willing to accept payments. But, I realize, here again, if it's to happen, it will. (Gads, can I say that enough? Let me tell you, I"m a firm believer in that if nothing else in my life.... :) )

So fifty-one is approaching this spring. Now comes the time to think, 'Okay, is this REALLY pushing our limits here?" We have great life insurance. We have two options for care should we both die at the same time. We have the room, we have the farm......it's just the $$ is tight....and well, we'll be FIFTY ONE!

Should this REALLY be the line, here? Is this unfair? For the record, my thinking is IF we go straight ahead with this, it's, say, a one year term. In all of our other babies, the longest we ever had to wait was 18months...and that wasn't because babies weren't available, rather because we wanted only a girl, and would only accept AA babies. The other three have come to us within four months or less....and.....we definately prefer the 'stork babies', because I think matching is just so hard on everyone----expectant ladies AND The hopeful adoptive parents.

Opinions please. Are we totally crazy NOW.......while I really in my heart wish to do this again......I also don't want to short change the family---or this possible baby in any way.

Thanks for your input........

Sincerely,

Linny

joskids

December 15, 2007

You already know what Josie would say, don't you Linny Girl??!!! It's about how YOU FEEL, what you think you can do as parents to another child. I admire the heck out of you . . . go for it. Your age has very little to do with it. Your attitude and ability and the fact that you already have a young family in your home is a big factor also.

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Withay

December 19, 2007

Here is how I look at it. I am most likely going to be named adoptive mom of my current fs during 2008. In January I will be a young 52. This will be my first child and he will be 1 year in February.

Age is strictly a number that says how many years you have been on this earth. More important is how you feel and how your health is.

cheesehead

December 28, 2007

A very happy and healthy New Year to all!

Thanks to everyone who has posted here.....I really needed to see this today! It certainly helps me to know that others are just as "crazy" as we are in making the decision to start a family, when most people our age are now starting to have their grandchildren.

I was 52 in November and DH will be 50 in February. It's funny, but there are people that we have not yet told of our plans to adopt from China. When the situation presents itself, we take the opportunity to tell them....and we get this blank stare....and repeat of "you're adopting?" Now, I'm not sure if they are just speechless from excitement or just don't know what to say because they really think we have gone off the deep end....

We are currently in the LONG wait to adopt our daughter from China and it seems that the wait will continue to get longer. When we started the process we were still in our late 40's...and the wait was 10-15 months. Now they are saying the wait is at least 24 months and will more than likely go to three years. YIKES!!!! Who would have thought that we would be closer to 54 when we get our referral for our daughter. We have asked for a girl between 0-5 years, but in China because of our age, we are only eligible for a child as young as 3. That would be perfectly fine with us to receive a child who is a bit older...especially with the long wait still ahead of us.

As of late, I have had many second thoughts recently about our decision because of my age. My husband on the other hand, thinks age has nothing to do with our decision. But then again, it is how you feel and how active one is in life. We are both very active and can't imagine sitting in a rocking chair or a bingo hall in the near or even distant future.

Of course, those with children are still making the comments to me .... "well, just wait...you'll be exhausted".

So......thanks to everyone for helping me to know that others are with us....we will not be the only "older" parents who get "the look" when talking or shopping in the baby/children's departments.:grouphug:

joskids

December 28, 2007

As to being "exhausted", please! Parenting is just as exhausting at 28 as it is at 50. I see so many young mothers with no patience, no confidence, saying that if they knew that parenting was so difficult they would not have done it. I think us older moms already know how committed we need to be and, obviously, waiting 3 years for a placement is what I call true commitment!!!!!!! My good wishes to all of you that are still waiting. The best is yet to come!!!!!!!!!!!