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Ok I have been visiting for a month or so I have prayed for many of you. I am going to post and hope someone can help me find some info. My Nephew came to us at 4 months old he was neglected flat head on the back and was very ill. He was lifeflighted when we had him for 26 hours. He died 3 times the 3rd day we had him. We sat by his side at the NICU and watched him struggle everyday he was given a 5 % chance of survival. We were there for a month and we got to bring him back home now I am happy to report he is a very happy healthy 17 month old. He was removed from the home because my BIL was beating his step children and molesting them. The prosecuter hasnt filed criminal charges on him for the sexual abuse but he spend 252 days in jail for the physical abuse. SIL decided she wouldnt stay and do her service plan so instead she ran into the ARMY. We are due for our 2nd permancy hearing and they are saying we cant take the mothers rights because of the soldier relief act. I have read it and it covers her if she was deployed she is stateside until April. And it says if there is an open court case before they join it isnt covered this started 5 months before she joined. BIL will lose his rights for sure but I dont want guardianship I dont believe this woman should be a mother. The whole time he was in the hospital she never called or visited. I just want MY son to have a safe happy life But I have to get it through their thick heads she isnt covered. Anyone have some good sights or know ARMY laws?????? Thanks for the help
Unfortunately I know more about all of this than I want to know.
It is called the Soldier's Civil Relief Act and it is true that no civil case can be held "in absentia" (absent) any soldier during a tour of duty.
I'm not sure I understand the totality of your situation, but I seriously doubt there is anything you can do.
Supposedly while she is stateside you can file a motion, but it is unlikely it will go anywhere.
Trust me - I KNOW what this feels like: You want to be his MOM - not his guardian. You do not want to babysit for her until she decides to parent. You ARE his MOM in every sense of the word - except on paper. When people say that does not make a diffference, well, for some of us it does. It does make a difference that we are allowed to parent but only as long as the courts and birthparents say we can.
There is a military forum on here which may be able to provide more informtion for you.
(((HUGS))) I am thinking of you.
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Do you know if it makes a difference that this was an open case with CPS before she joined and we are still involved with the courts my nephew has been in foster/relative placement for 13 months and we are fast approaching the 15 month mark. And she has just had a case opened with my BIL we found out there was sexual abuse and they have listed the case as founded. She wasnt involved in the abuse but they are going to list her as failure to protect. I thought I read in the Act that if it is an ongoing case she cant use the act and this should be done by the time she is deployed.
JSAUNTIE,
Honestly I am not sure. Your case is quite complicated, as is mine. What I have learned is that in my experience the courts move very slowly. You wrote "and this should be done by the time she is deployed." I am skeptical of that.
I certainly do not want to discourage you. If she is found guilty of failure to protect then that can only help your case. I can only go on my own experience and that is that it is difficult to move things quickly in the courts. And she will have to be authorized by her commander to appear - and sometimes that in and of itself is difficult to obtain.
Look at it this way: you are dealing with 3 separate government agencies, the Army, CPS, and the courts. IN MY OPINION all three are bumbling idiots in government service and IMO the government in general is slow and ineffective. The chances of these three entities getting together in the best interest of your child - well, it CAN be done - but it will take a lot of cooperation amongst government agencies - and all I know to do is pray for you and your child that everything comes together.
If she gets charged on a criminal matter of neglect or failure to protect then the Army may be forced to allow her to attend the trial and then if she is convicted the Army might kick her out. BUT - I honestly do not know and am only guessing here.
Don't give up, don't give in, do your best - and know that if you have to wait an extended period of time that as hard as it is I am doing it and others here on this board are doing it. That is why we are here, some of us for years. It CAN be done (the waiting I mean) but it is excruciating.
Hang in there - do all you can - and know that I am here for you.
Christie
Thank you so much I do Know I will wait as long as it takes and I will not let them hurt this child as they have the other 3 I have made several phone calls this week and have found out that the lawyers are thinking they are going to give it a try and see what happens. Bio dad got a call from the CW last night and the CW told me he is still in denial that the children where ever hurt and he wants his son and he will do what ever it takes to get him. He has completed his caseplan so he doesnt understand why they wont give him back. DUHHHH he has a founded case of sexual abuse. And he still denies ever hurting the children. The oldest went to school with a shoe print on his face and it stayed there for 2 weeks. He admitted to the CW of beating the children but then says he never really hurt them. I am just so angry with this monster and his wife I cant let them have my son. I will sell everything I have to get the best lawyer I can to fight them. Thanks agian and I will be lurking
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<<DUHHHH he has a founded case of sexual abuse. And he still denies ever hurting the children. The oldest went to school with a shoe print on his face and it stayed there for 2 weeks. He admitted to the CW of beating the children but then says he never really hurt them>>
I pray the best interest of this child is always first. Sending good thoughts your way.
Yes this is a sad case and I told the CW I would be Done with fostercare after we get this settled I just dont understand this system. These babies where beat till their leggs bled, starved because they were bad the middle boy was caught eating from the trash at school several times. They got 600.00 a month in food stamps so I know there was plenty of food. They were turned in 16 times in 4 months from different people DR. Schools. church nursery, and we have just got all the info about the sexual abuse this is new the children had finally gotten settled with their bio dad and step mom and started acting out in sexual manner I can tell you I threw up after watching the video interview the police did with the kids. And my BIL failed his polygraph test after the police interviewed him. But he says he didnt do anything so we are now waiting for the prosecuter to see if they are going to file charges. They are telling us probally not because the kids are too young to put on the stand and the video interview is hearsay evidence. HUH???????? I dont get this and my hubbi is a cop. any way thanks for the prayers and I will keep you all informed.......to be continued