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Looking for good reading or advice on the different ages and the problems people run into. There are so many ages that area available. At what age does a normal child become a waiting child? We actually thinking we do not want a baby. A toddler would fit great into our family. Meaning.. Baby vs. Toddler vs Child :confused:
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I don't think toddlers are generally considered waiting children unless they have some kind of SN, most of the NSN waiting children I've heard about in the Asian countries tend to be pre-school age and older. I'm sure it varies from country to country though and probably one important variable is that a country that has just opened (or reopened) for adoption probably has a number of children of ALL ages that are "ready to go" so to speak. Also, and I could be wrong, it seems that the younger NSN waiting children tend to be boys since they're less popular with IA PAPs. You might want to take a look at "The Weaver's Craft" it's a really good book on toddler adoption (but I don't remember who wrote it). I think a lot has to do with the child's individual personality though, and the sort of care he or she has been recieving (i.e., a child raised by a birthparent & than left at the orphanage due to death or poverty shortly before becoming available for adoption is going to be in a very different place psychologically than one who's been in the orphanage since birth, etc.).
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This varies greatly by country. China, for example, will not list a healthy child as a Waiting Child unless he/she is age 6 or older. Infants, toddlers, and preschoolers can be listed as Waiting Children if they have special needs. However, China is no longer listing infants, toddlers, and preschoolers as Waiting Children if they have very minor special needs, such as a large birthmark or an undescended testicle. In general, the younger the child, the more serious the special need has to be before he/she is placed in the Waiting Child program. Overall, the term "Waiting Child" is a euphemism for "hard to place." It is easy to place healthy infants and toddlers, but very difficult to place school aged children, especially boys, and children with special needs. For this reason, agencies often offer reduced fees for Waiting Children. Their goal is to get a child into a family, and they are particularly interested in finding permanent, loving homes for kids whom most prospective parents won't consider. Sharon