problems with foster mom

Sorry,she wants to keep him, but I'm guessing she can't afford to adopt him. I don't know what to tell you, I think the teen shouldn't be moved from a place he lived at for years, if they want to keep them. But I guess it's up to the courts. How does the teen feel about it. I know as a teen, that grew up in fostercare, I would not want to move. I just think she's giving you a hard time, because she doesn't want to loose the teen or the teen doesn't want leave.

I'm sure it could be financial. He says he wants to be adopted and doesn't want to have to move again. The agency says that will always be recruiting for him to have a permanent residency. I would just like to to get some straight answers bc it's not fair to put anyone (family or child) if it's not necessary.

Your agency needs to step in and have a talk with her about the process and what she needs to do for the child. She can sabotage the adoption by feeding info to the child and making him not want to move either. Somebody needs to get a clear answer about why she will nto adopt. If she adopted she would get a subsidy considering the facts you've given, so I'm wondering if there is something else besides money involved for her. If your agency won't get hertalking, then by all menas, go visit her. She can't ignore you if you're at her door.

The boy could be given different answers, that's why you might be conflicted answers. Also not everyone knows they can get a subsidy. I found that out on here, not through the CPS. I took care of foster kids and didn't know that. The foster parent could be trying to talk him out of being adoped, but I wouldn't count on it. But anything is possible. I agree with Caddo Rose u should talk to your agency. But if the teen is giving conficting answers, you might not get the full story. Also the foster mother might not want to talk to you, because the worker could be hiding something. It's also not normal for a child or teenager to want to be adopted by a stanger. So I would give it time or try to get to know him before you adopt.

How far are you from his current home? He may not want to give up his school/friends.

I know that the foster mom is older, has children my age ( mid 30's). We do live about 30 minutes from him so it would be a change in schools and friends. The problem is that shes fosters thru a private agency and this child is for adoption thru local CPS agency. We are planning to meet with this young man and his caseworker next week if he decides he wants to move forward.

I wish you luck with your efforts to adopt a preteen child, if not that particular boy, then another. I agree that the foster mother may want to adopt him but not be able to afford it. I have a friend in Las Vegas who was a foster mother, who was in that situation of having foster kids she wanted to keep but couldn't take on financial responsibility of any more kids. I also agree that the agency should find out what the real story is and not be offering him as adoptable if he would rather stay where he is. It sounds like they are leaving you to try to figure out all of that, yourself. Our fourth adoption was kind of like that. Adoption is certainly not the "easy way"!