I met my birth mother 10 years ago, her other children knew nothing about me
I had a fantastic childhood with my wonderful parents , both have passed away
My birth mother refuses to tell me who my birth father is
It ruined my relationship with my siblings and I can't forgive her
No contact for 5 years, angry because I feel it's my right to know
I am 60
I am so sorry this happened to you. It sounds like your birth mother did not handle either her grief or her relationship with you well. I am sure she just doesn't know how to deal with this, but that's not an excuse to have handled it that way. I hope you find this forum a good source of support and a place to vent when you need.
Shelley,
I can relate, a little. I've always known my birthmother, but my birthfather has always been a mystery. There is one man listed on my birth certificate and she swears it's not him and has no idea how his name even got on there. All of the communication between my adoptive parents and the attorney reference this guy, as well. I have been unsuccessful in reach out to him to find out -- which is another frustration.
Then -- suddenly, she mentioned a name -- ironically, it was just months after this other guys death, so I couldn't confirm with him. Thankfully, I did connect with several half-siblings and based on the information we've shared, I believe that this other guy is my biological father.
It has strained the relationship I have with both my birthmother and my biological half-brother on my birthmothers side. We haven't talked in a very, very long time.
Have you tried doing the DNA testing that they have out there now? Have you gained access to your non-identifying information?
I am so sorry. That is an awful situation to be in. If you still want to find your birth father you should consider DNA testing. I used Ancestry DNA to find my birth parents.
1 Liked
 likes this.