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Our great nephews were taken from their mother last January. By the time we found out what was going on and the birth parents rights were going to be severed, the boys had been with a friend of the birth mothers (which she claimed was the youngest boys God mother) for 9 months. It took me two weeks to get the right person to contact to see what was going on. They tried to push us away and told us they were close to letting the current care giver adopt the boys. There is a big issue here. Our oldest nephew lived with us when he was first born as did his mother because she wasn't allowed to be alone with him. At that time a case worker came to our home and did a home study and asked us if something was to happen to our nephews mother and she could not care for him would we adopt him. We said yes. The birth mother later on left as she didn't want to abide by our rules. DCF let her go and she had another baby. Deep down we always new that if something were to happen DCF or someone would contact us. Well they never did and now we are fighting to adopt our great nephews. How is this right? What should we do? I have a lawyer but she is not to stern. We go to visitations every other week. We went through the classes and did our home study. We now have to do a bonding assessment with the boys as well as the care giver do one as well. I feel like the system as screwed us. The boys belonged with us from the start. Their older brother is still in our family also as my mother in law adopted him as a newborn. It has now been 6 months that they boys have had more time to bond and we didn't ever get offered visitations until February when in a class we took I learned we could ask for visitations. Can someone please give me some insite?
Last update on April 12, 8:21 pm by Megan Atkins.
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Hi Megan,"How is it right?" It's not! It's devastating to have cared for your nephew and then find out he was placed with your sister's friend.Likely your sister approved of that placement, or possibly she didn't object, if they were able to locate her.It's been more than a month, and I hope things have gone well, and that your nephews are placed with you.:sparkling_heart:If you and your nephews are still trapped in the foster care system, one thing to remember is that employees of the Child Welfare system, and the Family Court system, just want their jobs to be easy, so they'll look at the situation and decide to "not find" family, and push through adoption. Less paperwork, fewer court hearings, etc.#1 try to find a solution where your nephews live with you, and the Child Welfare system has to do the absolute least amount of work#2 push for custody, based on your ongoing relationship with one child, having cared for the child at bith. Do this in the nicest possible way, in court, with a smile. Insist that there's great sadness in the fact that the Child Welfare system was ineffective in locating you, but that your long-term relationship with your oldest nephew and your direct family relationship to the two boys, outweighs all else, in giving the boys a permanent home, that directly connects them to their biological family heritage.#3 get a new lawyer, one that will fight for your rights, and I don't know all the options in all States, but in my state, anyone can file for 3rd party custody of any child, regardless of shared DNA. I believe it's to your advantage to get your story on the court record, and filing for custody is how one can do that in my State.#4 Learn to act.It's best if you give the Child Welfare people the illusion that you believe they're going to protect the boys, and that they're the heroes, so all things positive, while you make your plans to go around them, or put them in a position where you get custody.
Last update on May 28, 7:49 pm by michelle foss.
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Was this ever resolved? I am asking, because I am in the same situation. But in my case it is two blood nephews and their half-brother. Their dad passed away last June and they were thrown into foster care / their daycare. My sister-n-law at the time did not have custody and insisted that her brother and myself take custody if she was not able to get her boys. It has been 10 months of fighting the system, no matter what we do. They have known from day 1 we wanted to take in all three boys to give them a stable and loving home, but it has been a nightmare. All we get is that they have bonded. We have not been able to do anything till our ICPC packet was completed, which DCFS held onto for four months before sending it to our state for completion and right as we were about to do our home-study which was the final part (We have been approved) they had an emergency court hearing and awarded the foster moms daughter guardianship of all three. I am fighting such a corrupt system. You would think if there is family that is wanting them why not let them.
Write a letter to the head person in charge. It's possible guardianship was granted to give the kids some stability while everything was happening.
Was this ever resolved? I am asking, because I am in the same situation. But in my case it is two blood nephews and their half-brother. Their dad passed away last June and they were thrown into foster care / their daycare. My sister-n-law at the time did not have custody and insisted that her brother and myself take custody if she was not able to get her boys. It has been 10 months of fighting the system, no matter what we do. They have known from day 1 we wanted to take in all three boys to give them a stable and loving home, but it has been a nightmare. All we get is that they have bonded. We have not been able to do anything till our ICPC packet was completed, which DCFS held onto for four months before sending it to our state for completion and right as we were about to do our home-study which was the final part (We have been approved) they had an emergency court hearing and awarded the foster moms daughter guardianship of all three. I am fighting such a corrupt system. You would think if there is family that is wanting them why not let them.