Adopting a biracial child

When I started my adoption journey, I called many agencies. Some were recommended by friends, others I got by simply opening up my phone book to "Adoption" If you are open to a bi-racial or African American infant, my experience is that you should have many options and definitely some will be more affordable than others. I would suggest you start by calling any agency with "Social Services" in its name - Catholic, Lutheran, Jewish, etc. Most of them don't require you to be of their faith for an AA/bi-racial adoption (and their fees are usually considerably lower). Then call any non-profit agencies you can. Better yet, can you find any that are public/private? Our special needs infant adoption is going to cost us nothing. CSS's fee is $2000 - the same amount our state reimburses for a sn adoption. The options are out there if you look. I learned quite a bit by calling. You don't have to go through your state to adopt a waiting child. Many social service and non-profit agencies will do your homestudy (with no cost) and can do placement. We're becoming foster parents through Catholic Social Services. Our license will be recognized by the state, but the training is done individually and taking only a fraction of the time it would have if we'd gone to our county classes.

First of all I think what a great world we could live in if our families are of all different races. No one could be racist. We have three children. Our first son was Biracial and our other two are AA. My husband and I are both white. It was never a worry to me about if I should or shouldn't. I knew in my heart what path I was meant to take and that the children I was intended to have would come and they did. I know I will raise my children to love all of our differences as well as other peoples'. I know they will have difficult times. We do now with comments. But we are happy, our children are happy and that is what truely matters. Kids need love and that is what we all have to give. As far as agencies. I live in Ohio also and we also called around to many agencies. We went and interviewed them and when we found our agency we knew it was the one. We began our homestudy in March of 2000. It was suppose to take six months, but they were so in need of people to adopt biracial and AA children we had our first son at three days old in May 2000. In may of 2001 we adopted our second son at 17 months old, and in March of 2002 we adoped our lates child who was two days old when we brought him home. We are now on the list for another infant. Our agency is currently working with several birhtmoms that are due in the next few months. So we don't think we will be waiting much longer. My suggestion is if you don't feel comfortable with your agency keep looking. There are so many children out there and you shouldn't have to wait too long.

Chris, if you do not mind. What agency are you using in OH. There are so few agencies in VA that do domestic adoption. Most of them specialize in International adoption.

Have you tried contacting the Catholic Charities in VA (aka Catholic Social Services in other states)? There are 3: [url]http://www.catholiccharitiesusa.org/states/virginia.htm[/url] You should not have to be Catholic to adopt a bi-racial infant. Please also try looking in your phone book for Lutheran or Jewish Social Services. Call them and ask them about their adoption programs.

I did try Catholic Charities, however they did say that I cannot be a part pof their program, but they can use me as a resource. Which means that if they cannot find a catholic family to adopt the child, they will then turn to us. I do not have much hope. Especially in this area. Its very diverse - culturally and no one would have an issue with transracial families. Or, I have not met one yet. I will try Jewish and Lutheran and let you know what the outcome is.

I also contacted Catholic Charities in MN. They are open to couples of any religion, however, you must be infertile in order to adopt with them... That is really sad... Are there any other agencies out there that are not outragous in cost??

I live in Virginia and initially wanted to adopt thru Catholic Charities. Although I was raised Catholic, I am now Presbyterian and worried they would not accept us because they stated they only want Catholic families even though on occasion they'll make an exception. It took them about two weeks before they granted us an "exemption" stating their reasoning was that we are a very religious and actively practicing Christian family. I was relieved the first hurdle was passed. THEN we received the paperwork in the mail. I was absolutely astounded at how astronomical their fees are... and I'm one who does NOT think $12,000 - $15,000 is high. Off the top of my head I cannot remember the exact fee but it was definitely in excess of $20,000 and I seem to remember it being closer to $25,000. Don't get me wrong, even though we CAN afford it... we won't. It's just a matter of principle and even after talking to our local chapter at length I didn't get a "less negative" feeling about their high fees. There are MANY agencies out there - not every one is right for everyone. Just my experience.

Dear Bailey, I am a multiracial adult and all of my children are multiracial IAm 38 years old and was raised in the black community Up until I was in the 4th Grade. The black people called me white the white people called black so really didnt have any body to turn to I think that the children were jeolous. I got along best with the mexicans. they didnt care what color I was because in their ethnic background they have colors ranging from pale white to the darkest dark. anyways my mother was very lightskined she looked Hawaiian and my father was Creo. I dindnt see the color of their skin I only had to know that they loved me and it seemed tha nothing else mattered. Also the trend of the future is more interacially mixed and alot more so than 38yrs. ago So if you make a big deal over it it will be a big deal if you dont than it wont! Remeber your children only learn what they are taught! Just remember you are very special people because not everybody is willing to go out of their way for strangers and everybody deserves a mom and a dad and people they can call family. that is the only thing that matters nothing else matters Kids adapt to their environment. Lastly Where i live it is cool to be mixed.

I must say I am surprised by the Catholic Charities in your areas. Out here, you do have to be Catholic and infertile to adopt a "healthy white infant" but you don't have to be either to adopt "anything else." The "healthy white infant" program is $8000 and the "special needs" program is only $2000. I never would have imagined it would have been so different in other areas. It seems a shame that there are agencies in Ohio in need of couples and couples elsewhere willing to adopt and the two just can't seem to match up.

I had the exact same experience (financially speaking) with Catholic Charaties in VA. Will Cath Charities in OH work with people outside of the state?

I only have had contact with the CSS in my city. I remember from a conversation a while ago with my SW that they try really hard to place the babies they get with couples waiting with them. Occassionally people send them profiles and homestudies, but they really don't do anything with them. When they get a baby they can't place, then they will network and solicit profiles. I guess it couldn't hurt to send to them, but it doesn't sound like it won't do any good. Have you tried adoption attornies? I only ever talked to one and he didn't charge anything to register with him. If he makes a match for you, he charges his fees for the legal services only. I had heard from someone else that he was really reasonable, but I never got that far in the discussion with him since he's only ever done 2 non "healthy white infant" matches.

I am a biracial adoptee, who was adopted by a white family. I am half Saudi Arabian, and half Jewish, but I look fully Saudi Arabian, and even half black. I have a little brother who was also adopted, but is white. I love my parents, little brother, and family very much, but you need to be careful. I have always felt some what out of place, and distant from my family. I don't look anything like them, and it really does cause some conflict. You need to be sure that you are ready to face all of the different problems and issues that will surely come up. I resent the fact that I was not introduced to my culture, and that I had to wait until I started college to really get to know my 'people' and what my culture was like. All through out middle school and High school I had social and emotional problems, because I didn't know where I really fit in, and my parents couldn't help me find my place. I have lived in Portland, OR all my life, and I go to Portland State Univeristy. I was lucky because Portland has one of the biggest middle eastern populations in the U.S., but I'm still searching for myself. At 21, I am just now starting to know where I fit in and feel truely comfortable. I really do love my family, but sometimes love just isn't enough. If you do adopt a biracial child, I suggest that you learn everything there is to know about their culture before you adopt, and have people of the same race as the child aroud them to guide them in finding about their culture, but to also helf and guide you. I don't think that every child will go through as rough a time as I did, but I'm sure that there will be a time when they need to know all there is to know about their race, culture, and people like them, and that is something that a parent can't fully help them with if they are of a different race. There is more to a race than you can ever learn in a book, or from others guiding you from that race, because unless your in their shoes daily, you will never be able to understand. I'm not tyring to discourage you, but warn you, and tell you the truth! My email address is; cramersethj@hotmail.com Email me anytime if you would like to talk some more! Sincerely, Allison

Allison, thank you for the advise, but that is EXACTLY why we want a biracial child. We want the mix to be AA/CC. My husband is white and I am black. I do know that it is tough enough growing up, but it seems as though you have adjusted well. I have a friend who is adopted and had some of the same issues that you mentioned. And because of that, my husband and I have decided that we will only move forward with open adoptions.

My husband and I were talking last night about this issue. We are both white and have adopted one biracial (AA/CC) and two AA. I think there is a difference in adopting AA and other races. People who adopt from other countries or people who adopt races that are less common need to really educate themselves. My husband and I have been finding it easy with our children because we have many friends that are AA and almost everywhere you go there are AA people around. They see people who are like them everyday. I do believe that transracial adoptions work it just takes a lot of work. My children are my world and I'm confident that with good parenting and respect for them and their culture will help them grow into well adjusted adults. I'm not saying I don't think they will have problems. I think every adoptee does at some point. CRis

you know my family is made up of serveral racial and ethnic groups. They are just my family. I have a girlfriend who adopted across racial lines . before adoption some family members were not sure it was what she should do and had very limited ideals about it. but when she put that child in family members arms it was love at first site. so if your heart is open and you are willing to go the extra mile for the child then adopting across racal lines doesnt have to be a issue. But I do belive as child grows they need to be exposed to their culture or whatever ethnic group they would be identified with by society so that they can function as a health and whole person.