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A few months ago, when I first discovered this forum, I read a response of a mom from Georgia. I wish I could remember her name so I could thank her personally, but I can't. Anyway, she replied to someone who was asking how to do a "last name" name change. For two years I had been told I needed the consent of the biofather. Even though I had no way of finding biofather, I still could not do it without consent. Luckily I fell upon the reply from the "lady from Geogia." What she said to do was to go down to the court house and request a name change. If biofather cannot be found a public notice will be placed in the newspaper. If biofather does not contest, BAM you've got the name change. I think her exact words were "It's easy! All you do is. . . " And she's right. It was even easier for me. After I told the judge the story he did not even bother to post the notice. Thinking I would be involved in a long drawn out process, it took only about 20 minutses. So whoever you are, I thank you very much. After being married for 2 years and having different names, our family is that much closer to completing a step-parent adoption.:)
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This is getting interesting. My case is that my sons lastname isn't my maiden name, my married name, or the biofathers lastname. Stupid me gave my son my husband at the times lastname. When he and I divorced we had to have a DNA test done to prove to the court he wasn't my husbands (for child support reasons). So I have DNA test saying...the guys who is on your sons birth certificate listed as the father...is not his father. Is this going to make it harder for me? Basically my son is living with the lastname of just some guy. Not my name, biofathers, or my maiden name.
My child had a hyphenated last name: my maiden name-biodads last name. Although soon afer his abandonedment I had stopped using the second half of my childs last name. I believe you would be able to change your son's last name to whichever you want. You'd probably just need to tell the judge why you want to change it. When I did it, I told the judge I wanted my child to have the same last name as the rest of her family (my husband and I have since had a second child). To comment to Freezgirl's reply: I wouldn't know what to do in your situation. Although, if I remember right, it was who was listed on the birth certificate that has to sign a consent. In any case, I would just call the court house till I found out. And it may take a couple of phone calls. I spent over two hours (on hold, being transfered, repeating my story) on the phone trying to find out exactly what to do. So if I had to give a bit of advice, I would say: "Don't give up even if someone tells you it can't be done. Call someone else till you can find out what you want." If I would have done that, I would have completed the name change 2 years ago.
Again, THANK YOU for your advice! I guess Monday morning I will be on the phone. This morning I had out the phonebook ready to get started but you know how it goes with 2 kids around the house....one thing leads to another and it doesn't get done! Well if the case is that whoever is listed as father on the birth certificate needs to give consent....it shouldn't matter in my case since there was a DNA test to prove he isn't the father. Hopefully all goes well!
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I have a 12 year old son, he has his bio dad's last name, although we were never married. He walked out of my son's life 10 years ago. He has never paid any support, or even called to check on him, to say happy birthday, no holidays. He lives about 25 minutes away. It is not even a long distance call. My husband of 8 years wants to adopt him. Thanks to you, now we know how to go about getting it done. THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don't know how it is where you live...but here in Hawaii you HAVE to have consent of the biological father. My son doesn't have his lastname but I still have to have his consent. Hes has never had ANY contact with my son...but still I have to have his permission. Makes no sense to me. Good luck.
Unfortunately, in Tennessee you also have to have consent. In fact, even if they do consent, the judge probably will not. You can only change it to your maiden name here, and the judge usually will not agree because then the mom gets married and the child has a last name that belongs to no one. Also, they think that the name should generally not be changed so that the sperm donor (in my case) has someone to carry on his name and they at least have the bond of the same name. Sorry. I was very disappointed last week when I found out. It also requires a lawywer, therefore a good deal of money.
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I am confident you guys can get the answer you want. It has been over two years ago I went through the same thing. I called the court house (I think maybe two or three times) and was told the same thing. Probably because they were all in the same office and were just repeating "policy." I supposedly needed biofathers consent. Didn't matter that I didn't know where he was. I was told there was nothing I could do. In the two years I moved to a different county (same state) and thought I would give it another try. This time, different office people, same court. I now live in a small community and believe that has a lot to do with the easy process I went through. Just one important note, it is not that I didn't need to have consent, it is that I didn't know bio's location or how to get ahold of him. So in place of the consent they post an ad in the paper. In my particular case though, the judge just went ahead and did it. I'm probably repeating myself alot from my other posts, but I now how defeated I felt two years ago thinking I would have to wait till the adoption was finalized. I feel if I would have been more persistent back then my child would not have to have waited the extra two years.
Hello My sistuation is kind of the same my daughter is 3 and I never married her BF. I left BF before she was one because of drugs and drinking (PARTYING). I have married now for two years and my husband and I would like to change her name. Her BF has had nothing to do with her. I would like to change her name before she starts school so she could have our last name. On the birth Certifacte the BF never sign but I did put that as her last name. I dont beleave the BF lives in this state. I live in arkansas well any info would be great. I called the court house and they told me I should hire an attorny but I really cant afford the high fees. Espcally when you say youonly did it for 40. dollars. I know that every sistuation is different. Just as every states laws so if you have any comments or suggestion on maybe a way I should go Thank you Jackie
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Thank you..I was browsing the forum hoping to get somekind of good news and you provided me with that. I do have some more questions about "name change" process and hope you can help me with them. What happens if when they post the notice a bio dad decides to comeforward or try to. I don't know my daughter's dad and I don't know where he lives or is from or anything but I want her last name changed to match mine.
I did the same thing...the biof has had nothing to do with the child for the past 4 years-no phone calls, no b-day presents, no christmas card, NOTHING, and my son (6) wanted his name changed to my and my husbands last name. We filled out the papers, had everything posted in the paper (twice,even). He shows up to court contesting the change, and then asked for lower child support and weekend and half-summer visitation (which he already has, but has refused to use). Now we're embroiled in a custody battle, and I'll be ****ed if my son is forced to spend extended periods of time with a stranger. So we filed for adoption. Just be careful what you wish for...it may end up being a Pandora's box o'trouble.