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October 24, 2017 by
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How do you feel about this? I have mixed reactions. Part of it I agree with- there is an element of loss in adoption, and it's not fair to expect adoptees to be grateful or think it's wonderful. But I'm not sure about it being the same thing as the death of your mother. I'm.sure it varies from person to person, and that it really does feel like that to some adoptees. In fact, I relate- placing my daughter in some ways feels like she died. I didn't get to raise her and I grieve for her. But she didn't die, she's alive and thriving and happy! So I don't know about it being the same thing. Maybe similar, because of the grief, but not the same.
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I'm adopted. I don't think the infant nor child brain can tell the difference between my mom died and mom isn't here. I'm an adult and my opinion is: if you don't get to see each other, how is that different?