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Joanne Farnsworth replied on Leah_Merriman_1411421995's thread "Birth mom, knows who adopted son is, scared to contact".
Leah, what do you have to lose? You can either let it all go and move on with your life wondering or you can take a step in love for your son and pursue the answer to all your questions. Your son, whatever his status is, deserves to know you. You are kin, blood. You have much information to release including medical records which are so very important for his life. As far as the adoptive parent(s), you can be gentle with them but your son has the ultimate decision at the age of 18 to decide what kind of relationship he wants with you. Choosing to do this yourself or with an intermediator I cannon comment. Good luck and pray because God WILL give you the open door if it is His desire for you to be reunited with your son.
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Joanne Farnsworth replied on Rashaud James's thread "Adoptee Born In. Washington DC".
Rashaud, I'm a birthmother and I assure you, you are loved, needed, and most of all wanted to be found. Please know that God makes NO JUNK. You are wonderfully made by our Lord. So many birthparents are afraid they would be interfering with your life should they seek to locate you. It is normal for you to feel unwanted, unloved, abandoned, and have a need to know from where you came. Because of your desperate need to be reunited, I suggest (as I did), hire a private investigator. I used "Kinsolving Investigators" out of Matthew, North Carolina. They specialize in finding adoption records. Depending on your financial status, this is a great way to put all your fears behind you. It cost me less than buying an old used automobile. They found my son within a month and it took that long because his birthdate had been changed by one day. They knew how to get around that. You have reached the age where you "need to know". Go for it and don't give up.
Joanne Farnsworth replied on cb221b's thread "Question for Birth Mothers".
Hello Adoptee!I'm a birthmother. In answering some of your questions . . . yes, yes, yes . . . this is what I experienced.- Yes, I was told you can get on with your life and put the birth behind you. Nope, that never happened- Yes, there was never a birthday, holiday, or friend/family birth that did not remind me of my son.- Yes, I wondered if he was alive or dead, if he thought of me, wanted to know me, wanted to find me??- Yes, I would accept him however I would find him.- I prayed during and after my pregnancy that God would place my baby in a Christian home. Yes, God answered by prayer.- Yes, he was worth the money to hire an investigator.A mother never forgets, always longs for a reunion, always loves.My suggestion to you is . . .- Go to the agency that facilitated the adoption and see if there is anything in a file from your birthmother. I say this because I left cards, letters, and pictures along with a signed form that allowed my son to locate me and have anything in the file. You could be surprised what is there. I found a 6 month old picture the adoptive mother left for me.- Hire an investigator to locate your mother/father, other family members. I hire "Kinsolving Investigators" out of Matthews, North Carolina. I had my son found within one month. It took that long only because the birthdate had been changed.- Your mother was undoubtedly living within 50 miles of where you were adopted.I hope I was helpful. I'm available if you have any additional questions. Pray