Adopting a child brings with it a lot of emotions. No one person feels the same as another.
But within the adoption community there are plenty of people who will gladly tell you how you should or shouldn’t feel. God forbid you cross paths with someone who doesn’t think your feelings are valid. You will run across people who look at you as a “savior” for “rescuing a poor, needy child” and worse, those who call you nasty names like “adoptoraptor” and say that you stole your “womb-wet” infant. (Yes, that was actually said in an adoption forum I read!)
Some days it feels like you can’t win no matter how you feel. That being an adoptive parent makes you somehow inherently evil. So let’s take a moment look at four things adoptive parents may feel, and why we shouldn’t be allowed to have these feelings.
DISCLAIMER—I fully acknowledge that there are women who were/are forced into adoption, who had children stolen from them. They deserve to be angry. But this article isn’t for you. It is for adoptive parents to laugh and feel normal in a world where there is no ‘normal.’