5 Gift Ideas for the Child You Placed for Adoption

What do I give this child that I have such a connection with?

Andee Otuafi December 05, 2015

Christmas is just around the corner, and if you are anything like me, you’ve been thinking about Christmas since Halloween! There is not a day that goes by that I’m not wracking my brain about what I should get for my mom, my dad, my sister, or my grandmother. That alone is overwhelming enough.

So It’s a whole new ball game when it comes to gift ideas for the child I placed for adoption. Every year as her birthday comes around, Christmas and other special occasions, I find myself in a rut. What do I get this child that I have such a connection with? I want to show her how much I love her without overstepping my boundaries. So for my sake, and the sake of every other birth mother, father, grandmother, etc, I have compiled a list of five memorable gifts to give to the child you placed.

1. A letter.

I know it sounds cliche, but a letter is not only easy on the wallet, it also comes from your heart. What better way to get them to understand your feelings for them and your decision to place than writing it down? A letter was one of the very first gifts I gave to the child I placed. She was only an infant then, but I imagine it is something that she will hold dear to her heart as she gets older and can learn to read and understand things on a more personal level.

2. A picture.

I am willing to bet that you have, somewhere in your home or work place, a picture of your sweet child. What better way to get them to understand your love for them than a picture of you two together? Printing it off and placing it in a nice frame, or even putting it on a craft you created, is something I can bet they will cherish forever. If you are in an open adoption, you can also replace the picture every year. This is something that will not get old and you can do every single year!

3. A record-a-story book.

How special the child would feel if they were able to hear your voice every time they wanted to! Especially if it was in a book talking about how much you love them. This is something they can cherish for a lifetime.

4. An item to encourage their hobbies or interests.

I love hearing about my little girls hobbies and interests! That is one of the wonderful blessings of an open adoption. I get to watch her grow, learn and progress. The little girl that I placed for adoption is incredibly into art. Whether it be play doh, coloring, painting, you name it, she’s obsessed! So I always love to encourage her talent by giving her something new to try in that subject. Doing this will also help the child know that you are aware of their interests and you are there to support them in whatever they decide to do!

5. A build-a-bear with your voice recorded inside.

This is another way to tell your child that you love them every time they need to hear it. Not only that but it’s a cuddly stuffed animal that they can take with them wherever they go! Another thing great about this, is that you can get a new outfit for it every year that goes with their interests, or personality. I got one of these for the little girl I placed and I was told a few weeks later that she wouldn’t let any of her friends touch it, because her ‘Birthday mom gave it to her’! She was only 3 years old and already cherished the significance of our relationship.

6. In conclusion . . .

As the Holidays draw closer and you begin thinking about gifts for the ones you love, I hope this list helps you make that decision for the one that made such a difference in your life! Do you have any ideas for these special gifts? What are some of the gifts you’ve given to the child you placed?

Andee Otuafi

Andee is the birthmother of a little girl whom she placed seven years ago in a very open adoption. She is now married and the mother of two more little girls, ages 2 and 4. She believes that being a mother is her calling in life, and she adores every minute of it! She loves being a part of the adoption community and is an advocate of open adoption. You can contact her through email at andeeleigh05@hotmail.com.

What do I give this child that I have such a connection with?

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