Most open adoptions focus on the relationships between children and their birth parents, or children and their biological siblings. However, when birth parents place their children for adoption, their parents may lose the opportunity to be involved grandparents. Grandparents’ Day is a wonderful occasion to remember your child’s birth grandparents.
We are very lucky to have a good relationship with our son’s birthmother’s mother. She recently joined Facebook and we became friends there, too. If you’re wondering why you’d even want to have a relationship with extended birth family, ask yourself these two questions:
Would I deny my child a relationship with my extended family? You might not be close to each and every family member you have, but, chances are, you have some family members you love and cherish. These are the people you can’t imagine life without. Well, your child’s birth family could be those people for him.
What if my child placed his or her child for adoption? Would I want the adoptive parents to acknowledge my presence?
If you have the opportunity, I highly recommend contacting your child’s birth grandparents and letting them know you remember and recognize them as your family., too
1. The easy way: A simple phone call. If you have a phone number for your children’s birth grandparents, use it! As they say in the song—reach out and touch someone.
2. The equitable way: Letters and pictures. You may send letters and pictures to your children’s birth mothers, why not send some to the birth grandparents as well?
3. The over-achieving way: Photo gifts. All of the major photo web services offer an array of items that you can adorn with your child’s picture. My personal favorites are puzzles, coffee mugs, and keychains.
I’ve found that my son really loves being able to call and talk to his birth grandmother. She’s been a great source of information and comfort over the years. This Grandparents’ Day, show your child’s grandparents how much you appreciate them.