Birth siblings are family, too. I consider my daughter’s birth parents and birth siblings as extended family and treat them accordingly, as a part of my daughter’s life. “According to the 2007 National Survey of Adoptive parents, 71% of adopted children have known birth siblings.”
Considering that high percentage, conversation regarding birth siblings is very important.
My daughter has three older birth siblings, two brothers, and a sister. I want her to have a relationship with her siblings and to have a relationship with her birth parents. Both are equally important. My responsibility in forming and maintaining this relationship is very important. It is also important that I share the information correctly at the appropriate time based on her development. That is why they have been included in my daughter’s story from the beginning.
During our visits with our daughter’s birth family, the birth siblings are just as excited as her birth mother to see her. They love getting on the floor, playing with her, and giving “piggyback” rides. Our daughter is still too young to fully understand the dynamics, but we talk to her about it so it isn’t a secret and is second nature to discuss.
I do expect to have questions in the future about her birth family. I want to keep every conversation positive. I also want the conversation to be open and constant. That is also why I am so happy that we have an open adoption so my daughter’s birth family can help answer these questions.