As an adoptive mom, I feel like I have got the best education and insight from birth mothers. These amazing women often have misconceptions about them, and I am on a mission to help debunk some of those because they are some of the best people that I know. Did you know that only 1% of women in unwed pregnancies choose adoption? These are the 1% that I am proud to know and call my friends. This will be an ongoing series of asking questions to real birth moms to educate and hopefully show the world what is really in their hearts. If you are hoping to adopt I would highly recommend that you get to know and become friends with birth moms. It will be one of the best things you can do for your adoption!

Here is the next question in our project:

real birth moms 6

What is something you wish others knew about birth moms?

I wish they could understand just how much we really truly love our birth children. And that we’re not all deadbeats that didn’t want anything to do with them. We wanted them, but knew they deserved more. Our love for them is what allowed us to break our own hearts. – Lindsey

We’re not whacked out crazies or druggies… We’re normal women just like everyone else. – Sherri

That we DO LOVE our babies, and that is why we are placing them. – Lauren P.

I can only speak for me, but that I have loved my birth daughter every day. – Melanie

We are not all forced by people or by our life choices. We choose it because we feel with our full heart this is what is right for our baby. – Jeanie

We’re not so overwhelmed with grief and regret that we don’t achieve anything else in our lives. We are strong, driven women, and for the most part, our experience with adoption has strengthened us, not weakened. – Shanna

I had a choice; no one pushed me. We don’t get paid to or bribed to place.  We choose to PLACE. – Margaret

That many of us COULD have parented. Many of us could have parented well. That it was not necessarily a choice made with our back to the wall. I hate when someone (hoping to validate my choice) says “you just knew you couldn’t do it”. It wasn’t that life with me would have been THAT bad, just that the life he COULD have was so much better. He was to have more than I had had, not less, not when more was available. – Tamra

I wish everyone understood the love a birth mom has for their child. Birth moms are beautiful women. – Roanne

I wish people knew how HARD it is. How extremely painful it is. Birth moms don’t choose adoption because we feel nothing. We choose adoption because we feel something! Society and how the movies portray us as it “ain’t no thang” is horrible. Like we’re happy to place? And when we change our mind, we are selfish? That isn’t right. That’s not humane. – Lauren

One of the most courageous acts of unselfish love. We NEVER quit loving. We still cry. We never “get over it.” – Annette

I never planned on getting pregnant and placing my baby for adoption. I made the best out of a poor choice. – Katelyn

We are normal people, just like you. No need for judgement. – Rachel

I wish others knew that birth moms come from all different backgrounds and situations. Being a birth mom doesn’t mean you are too poor or on drugs. Being a birth mom means loving your child more than yourself. – Catarina

We are not all disenfranchised girls without anything. We are mothers. We are wives. We are women who choose to love our babies more than our own lives. I am not a drug addict that lost her child due to neglect. I am a mother that chose a life for my child that I could never provide. – Alysia

We LOVE our babies so much. And that NEVER goes away. – Bridget

That birth moms always put their kids first, that we love always have & always will love our kids and that even if we’ve moved on, our kids will always holds a special place in our hearts. – Sonya

I’m not brainwashed. I do have feelings. And yes, I CHOSE to place my birth son. – Makena

Want to read more? Go to:

The Real Birth Moms Project | Part One

The Real Birth Moms Project | Part Two

The Real Birth Moms Project | Part Three

The Real Birth Moms Project | Part Four

Are you a birth mother? Answer this question in the comments below! Let’s all educate the world on REAL birth moms and not stereotypes.

What is something you wish others knew about birth moms?